Everyone shows up to the morning meeting... except for Chris. So, naturally, everyone automatically assumes that he died.
Jiffy: "What if he went into cardiac arrest during one of his love-making sessions? He makes love a lot, you guys."
Brad: "He's in the sunset of his life. He could easily be one of those who just doesn't wake up in the morning."
Chelsea: "Well, maybe he is dead. I don't know. But, do we have to wait to start the meeting?"
Later, Mike Rock, the show's announcer, asks the staff if they want to grab drinks. For no reason at all, everyone hates Mike. They make up an excuse not to join him, but then end up going out for drinks anyway.
Brad: "He's kind of like our adopted sibling. I mean, yes, he's part of the family, but we all know we're never going to love him the same way."
Heather convinces Chelsea to go to her book release party that night, which turns out to be less of a "party," and more of an intimate dinner with Chelsea's mortal enemies: The Kardashians. Yikes. The Kardashians are quietly horrified to see Chelsea, and Chelsea looks like she has a minor stroke when she sees them.
VIDEO: Watch ANOTHER clip of Chelsea and the Kardashians!
The staff is enjoying drinks at a bar when Mike shows up. Whoops. They all make excuses to leave when Mike's best friend, Charlize Theron, arrives. A tidal wave of regret crashes over everyone as they realize that now they won't be able to hang out with Charlize. Then, Jen throws up from drinking too much. Such a classy group of people!
Back at Heather's dinner party, the Kardashians start taking shots at Chelsea.
Khloe: "How is it being utterly alone?"
Chelsea: "I don't actually spend that much time alone."
Heather: "Her dogs sleep with her."
As Chelsea finishes washing her hands after a much-needed mental break in the restroom, Khloe shows up and confronts her. As revenge for making fun of her family so much on Chelsea Lately, she shoves Chelsea into a bathroom stall and steals her dress.
Poetic justice is served up next to a toilet by the hand of American royalty!