If you have plans on May 11, cancel them now. Because Daniel is having a bar mitzah and it's going to be ballllllllllin'.
In a YouTube clip that quickly spread beyond Little D's group of friends, the on-the-brink-of-manhood preteen raps over an instrumental of Jermaine Dupri and Ludacris' "Welcome to Atlanta" (which, BTW, came out when he was 2! What a pimp-ass 2-year-old!) about his now highly anticipated bash.
Why will this be the party of the century, you ask?
• This kid is connected. People who might make an appearance at his party: Shaq, Ne-Yo, Charles Barkley, Atlanta mayor Kasim Reed and his school principal.
• It's going to be kosher. How do we know? He tells us, "We're straight kosher munchin'." At one point he also rhymes, "Oink oink! Pig pig! Do away with the pork," though, as Vice originally pointed out, that could also mean that Daniel hates police. So expect this thing to be on another level (the illegal one).
• Little D looks like he can hold his own on the dance floor.
• Adults can get drunk on Bacardi (the official sponsor of Daniel's bar mitzvah? Maybe!)
• He split his spleen when he was 5 and is allergic to penicillin, so this kid knows how to live on the edge.
• He has a checkbook!
• It looks like they'll definitely be playing "Gangnam Style" at least once. And that's once too many for us.
We say invite in the headline, but that might not be giving Little D enough credit. This is officially labeled as a "Save the Date," which means there could be an even more epic invite to follow. But how could he possibly top this?! A stadium tour with Nicki Minaj?!