When she's not busy drinking health shakes made from acai berry, Kardashian placentas, and formaldehyde, Madonna enjoys spending time on social media. Last week everyone's favorite Material Matron joined Instagram and brought her lack of respect for our gag reflexes to a brand new platform. Already her timeline's full of choice close-ups of the body parts she hand-picked herself at the morgue.
First she gave us the rack focus, glistening with pilates sweat:
Then there was the up-thong taken from behind:
That's when the selfies started getting REALLY uncomfortable.
Fisting, anyone?? #redcarpet
Oh Madonna, you and your famous sense of humor.
But probably the most upsetting was this…
Fully shaved and ready for action ;) #RhymesWithMadge
Knowing it was just her armpit didn't make it any less gross.
Careful Madonna – you're walking a fine line between sexual harassment and full-on eye rape (though if you're one of her 100K + followers, I'm afraid it's considered consensual).