So it comes as no surprise Comedy Central's fake pundit had a little fun at Scientology's expense, especially in the wake of abuse allegations lodged by Pulitzer Prize winner Lawrence Wright, who appeared as a guest on The Colbert Report Wednesday night to discuss his new book, Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood and the Prison of Belief.
"If their lawyers are as litigious as they say, my new book could be called Going Broke," joked Colbert in his introduction.
He then kicked off the interview by questioning the author on the meaning of the tome's subtitle skewering the religion's lingo.
What do you mean by 'Prison of Belief?'" asked Colbert. "Are you a suppressive personality?...Are you upstats right now?"
"I am upstats. My upstats are great," replied Wright.
"'Cause I will confront shatter suppression," quipped the comedian.
On a more serious note, Colbert, who calls himself "America's most prominent celebrity Catholic," later queried Wright on his allegations of abuse within the Church and by its head, David Miscavige.
"If I found out the Catholic Church had abused 12 people, I would get outta there," deadpanned the funnyman in a not-so-subtle nod to the Vatican's own highly publicized abuse scandal. "I would be gone in a minute. What crazy religion."
Wright went on to explain that celebrities today who are Scientologists are "suffering a kind of martyrdom for their beliefs because it's the most stigmatized religion in the country." And what intrigued the writer was what the stars are getting out of it.
He then pointed to Scientology's poster child, Tom Cruise, whom he noted is coddled by the Church with extravagances that the regular folks don't receive—like having members build him a hangar for his private plane.
"These are people who are paid $50 a week, and they're polishing his lightbulbs," said Wright.
"More than I pay my interns. I should start a cult," joked Colbert.