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Walking Dead Premiere Recap: The Gang Cracks Heads, But Someone Gets Bitten!

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When we last left the world of The Walking Dead, "the group," as the characters so loved to call themselves, was down by two main men: Dale (Jeffrey DeMunn), dead at the paws of a walker, and Shane (Jon Bernthal) who shed his mortal coil with the help of onetime best friend Rick (Andrew Lincoln). Fear the living, indeed.

Lori (Sarah Wayne Callies), meanwhile, found she was pregnant; Glenn and Maggie (Steven Yeun and Lauren Cohan) found each other and Andrea (Laurie Holden) had found herself—just before she got left behind and then rescued by the amazing Michonne (Danai Gurira).

What will happen now, besides, you know, a whole lotta head shots? Let's get to it with a recap of the third-season premiere!

WHAT WE LEARNED

A man's home is his prison: Lori is now set to pop and she still, of course, doesn't know whose baby she carries. Even worse, the group is hard up for food, and there are just as many zombies as ever. They discover a real nice prison, though, and Rick declares it "perfect" for the group's next home. Even better? Looks like the entire gang, even Carol (Melissa McBride), has become a pretty crack shot. They take out a whole bunch of walkers, and things are lookin' mighty fine. You know. For a prison yard.

Machete kills! Looks like Michonne is still as deadly as ever with that wicked blade. Andrea is sick, though, and Michonne agrees not to leave her behind.

Love blooms in the darndest places: Awww. Glenn and Maggie are still tight. Carl (Chandler Riggs) might have a crush on Beth. (Emily Kinney). The only couple that may be on the rocks is Lori and Rick; the latter is cold and distant. Lori also worries about the fate of her unborn--what if it's totally born a zombie!?!?!?--but Hershel (Scott Greene) agrees to do whatever needs to be done if either the child or Lori meets a bad end.

Get caught up on Homeland!

You can serve a life sentence twice: Now all everybody has to do is clear out the prison proper using, um, hand-to-hand combat, and Rick'll be satisfied. Part of the group is pinned down by prisoners who appear, ahem, immune to lethal injection, and Hershel gets bitten. Rick performs an emergency amputation just as—lo! We discover a group of inmates who appear to be alive!

ONE-LINERS

"Something goes wrong, you could be the last man standing." —Rick Grimes

Now these are some sexy undead killers!

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