A hearty thank you to Chris Brown, Nicki Minaj, Jason Aldean, President Barack Obama, presidential hopeful Mitt Romney, Selena Gomez, Selena's tattoo artist, Justin Bieber, whatever the Biebs ate for dinner and, of course, Big Bird.
This last week was almost too interesting thanks to all of them.
And Robsten, don't think we forgot about you crazy kids...
AMERICAN HORROR STORY: Nicki Minaj let her temper get the best of her in a verbal dustup with fellow freshman judge Mariah Carey that, thanks to smart phones, ended up being more than an off-camera spat. Now people are wondering just how explosive this season of American Idol is going to be and whether the dueling divas are going to be able to make it work.
BERATED R: Chris Brown is back in L.A. after running into good pal Rihanna seemingly everywhere he went in New York. It was a productive trip, though—he finally let Karrueche Tran move on with her life because their relationship and his friendship with Rihanna weren't mixing.
AFTER HE CHEATS: Jason Aldean and onetime American Idol contestant Brittany Kerr shared at least a kiss in what was not a fine moment for either—even less so for Aldean, considering he's married with two daughters.
MUPPET BABIES: Despite his love for Big Bird and his like for moderator Jim Lehrer, Mitt Romney definitively vowed to slash the federal subsidy for PBS during the first of his three scheduled debates with President Barack Obama. So much for sunny days and sweepin' the clouds away.
WEDDING BELLS: Anne Hathaway slipped into a stunning Valentino original and married Adam Shulman...Stanley Tucci tied the knot with Felicity Blunt...MSNBC anchor Thomas Roberts swapped vows with Patrick Abner...Cat Deeley and Patrick Kielty made it official in Italy...Lisa D'Amato, winner of America's Next Top Model's all-star cycle, married Adam Friedman...Kings Of Leon's Jared Followill married Martha Patterson.
THE WHOLE NINE MONTHS: Drew Barrymore and hubby Will Kopelman welcomed their first child, daughter Olive...Tom Ford and his partner Richard Buckley welcomed their first child, son Alexander John Buckley Ford...American Idol alum Carly Smithson and hubby Todd welcomed daughter Olivia Mabel Smithson, their first child...Taylor Hanson and wife Natalie welcomed daughter Wilhelmina Jane Hanson, their fifth child together...Vanessa Lachey presented baby Camden.
NECK AND NECK: You didn't miss Selena Gomez's new tattoo, did you?
HEAD OVER HEELS: More importantly, you didn't miss Justin Bieber throwing up onstage in Arizona, did you?
PARIS IN THE WIG TIME: Paris Jackson tried on a Miley-esque short 'do and caused quite a stir.
SNAPPED: Lindsay Lohan claimed she was assaulted by one Christian LaBella at a NYC hotel after she noticed him snapping pics of her with his cell phone and called him out for it. A witness to what went down (LaBella hasn't been charged with any crime and LiLo has opted to drop the idea of civil action) doesn't think Lohan is in a particularly good place right now.
SAD NEWS: RuPaul's Drag Race contestant Sahara Davenport, nee Antoine Ashley, died of heart failure at only 27.
SIZE MATTERS: Christina Hendricks doesn't consider herself full-figured, nor should anyone else.
STILL SMILING: George Clooney and Stacy Keibler still made for quite the picture-perfect couple on the red carpet despite the breakup rumors.
BROTHERLY LOVE: Ron Livingston spoke up in support of sister Jennifer Livingston, a Wisconsin news anchor who shared on the air an email from a viewer that criticized her weight. Yeah, that went pretty viral.
TMI: We knew there was a Hulk Hogan sex tape out there, but we had successfully blocked it from our minds...until now.
DIFFERENCE OF OPINIONS: Former Saved by the Bell star Lark "Lisa Turtle" Voorhies' mother says her daughter is battling bipolar disorder—a claim the actress denies, calling her mother "overloving."
ALTAR-BOUND: Good Morning America weather anchor Sam Champion is engaged to longtime beau Rubem Robierb.
SPLITSVILLE: Knock us over with a feather, but The Bachelor's Ben Flajnik and Courtney Robertson have broken up...Two and a Half Men's Melanie Lynskey filed for divorce from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia's Jimmi Simpson...Carmen Electra and her fiancé Rob Patterson split up, which is good, because she's dating Simon Cowell...Breckin Meyer and wife Deborah Kaplan are divorcing after nearly 11 years.
TV LAND: Seth MacFarlane tapped to host the Oscars...Honey Boo Boo took a beating from South Park...Anderson Cooper slammed Star Jones' jab that Cooper came out for ratings...Backstage at Dancing With the Stars...Bristol Palin wasn't a Game Change fan...Ann Romney to sub for Robin Roberts on Good Morning America...Chelsea Handler had an emotional moment on Katie...Arnold Schwarzenegger had all kinds of things to tell 60 Minutes.
RECAPVILLE: It's fall again! That means you need to catch up on Jersey Shore, Grey's Anatomy, Glee, The X Factor, Teen Mom: Farewell Special, Sons of Anarchy, Dancing With the Stars, The Voice, The Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion, Revenge, Boardwalk Empire, Dexter and Once Upon a Time.
MUSICAL NOTES: Watch Miley Cyrus' backyard performance of "Look What They've Done to My Song"...Amnesty International would prefer Rihanna and Shakira not play Azerbaijan...the Beach Boys' Mike Love denies firing Brian Wilson from the band...Rush, Public Enemy, N.W.A. among nominees for Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's 2013 class...Mumford & Sons' Babel had the best first-week sales of the year...Watch Luke Bryan's latest video, "Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye"...Hear Adele's Skyfall theme...George Michael will seek treatment for anxiety instead of touring Australia.
LAW & DISORDER: We don't doubt that the Hulk Hogan sex tape may drive some to drink, but that's no excuse for allegedly drinking and driving, Linda Hogan...The FBI is investigating yet another suspicious powdery package sent to the Dancing With the Stars studio in honor of Bristol Palin...Daryl Hannah arrested while protesting again...$127,000 worth of jewels stolen from Julianne Moore's NYC pad...Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart sued Billy Corgan over a smashing tree...Stephen Baldwin copped to driving with a suspended license.
FASHION FORWARD: Taylor Swift opened up to Glamour...Lady Gaga left her top behind while posing with Donatella Versace...Kim Kardashian donned a wedding dress for Tattler and talked weddings. It wasn't weird at all...Liam Hemsworth tamely posed with a lion for Bench clothing...Kate Upton is covering Cosmopolitan.