BRAVOSometimes, a picture of a heavily botoxed face is worth a thousand words.
Last night's Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion not only delivered some major verbal fireworks ("Listen, you and your f--king Christmas pageant dress, sit back and shut the f--k up," for example), but several priceless facial expressions. We break down five of the ladies' most memorable:
1. Jacqueline and Teresa Face Off: So this is what it looks like when two former BFF's lay eyes on each other for the first time in a year. Jacqueline Laurita and Teresa Giudice didn't even bother to wait for the first commercial break before going for the jugular. Accusations about Strippergate and ruining families and gaudy devil-red dresses vs. gaudy envious-green ones…who knows what the truth about any of it actually is. But can we all agree that arguing about it makes both ladies look totally cray?
2. Caroline Takes In a Fan Insult: After host Andy Cohen whipped out his trusty reunion notecards to read aloud an unflattering fan comment directed at Caroline Manzo ("You're a bitter ginger with a twist-of-lemon face"), Mama Manzo's narrowed eyes and sour expression said it all: "Damn you for knowing me so well, Sarah from Quincy, Ilinois! Damn you!!"
3. Lauren Manzo Rips Into Teresa: What was supposed to be a fairy-tale makeover moment for Caroline's daughter, who'd lost 35 pounds, turned into a major nightmare when Tre couldn't resist mocking both Caroline's appearance and Lauren's new lapband. (The weight often comes back after getting one of those, Teresa sneered.) From the look on her face, we were certain Lauren was going to leap over the coffee table and rip those bad extensions right outta Tre's insensitive head.
4. Jacqueline Reacts to Teresa's Claims of Jealousy: "You wanna be me!" Tre cried. Just look at that face. Clearly, she was right, and Jacqueline whole-heartedly agrees. Not.
5. Teresa Nearly Loses Her (No Doubt Fabulicious Italian) Lunch: Cousin Kathy Wakile's hubby, Richie, made some pretty tasteless comments about Teresa throughout the season, so it's no surprise that Tre reacted badly to Kathy's sarcastic remarks about Richie wanting her. Thankfully, Jersey's most-famous Housewife didn't actually pull a Bieber and hurl all over the Borgata's posh carpet. Maybe she's saving that for parts two or three?
Part two of the explosive reunion airs Sunday, Oct. 7.
(E! and Bravo are both part of the NBCUniversal family.)