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Kate Middleton Topless Scandal: Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good Celebrities When They Sunbathe?

Kate Middleton Danny Lawson - Pool/Getty Images

Before there was Kate Middleton, there was Sarah Ferguson, and Jennifer Aniston, and the A-list goes on and on. 

So, why do so many celebrity photo scandals involve sunbathing?

Wild guess: Because sunbathing involves nudity?

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Technically, of course, it doesn't have to. Per Merriam-Webster, sunbathing is defined as the act of exposing oneself to sunlight—there's nothing that says a sunbather must be nude, and, indeed, most people keep their tops and bottoms on. (Or at least they say they do.) Only 2 percent of Americans and 2 percent of Middleton's British subjects show off their homemade bodysuits on beach, according to a recent survey

The relative novelty of the act combined with the power of celebrity make the nude sunbathing celebrity an irresistible draw for the paparazzi.

Unfortunately.

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"There is a goofiness surrounding celebrities," says Bob Morton, " that creates its own justification for bursting the bubble of privacy…These photographers are not respecting it, period."

Morton is steeped in privacy concerns as chairman of the Naturist Action Committee, a nudist-rights group. 

Outside of sweeping the seas and lands where celebrities congregate of all photographers (an impossible scenario), Morton sees one surefire solution.

Another royal naked scandal

"Ultimately, if this [nudity] weren't such a big deal, it wouldn't be a big deal for celebrities," he says.

"If people would accept bodies for what they are, if body acceptance was more pervasive, then there would less fascination with the dangly bits."

Some day, Prince Harry, maybe some day.

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