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Game of Thrones Recap: War Is Waged, but Is the King in the North Distracted?

Peter Dinklage, Coleth Hill, Game of Thrones Helen Sloan/HBO

Westeros is filled with men of honor and some who are completely devoid of it.

Last week Jon Snow's (Kit Harington) new wildling friend was giving him some grief. Meanwhile, the King in the North, Robb (Richard Madden) was off somewhere getting lucky helping procure medical supplies. And worst of all, Theon (Alfie Allen) presented the charred bodies of the allegedly captured and killed little Stark boys to Winterfell—but come on, we all know Hodor and Osha (Natalia Tena) could outsmart the Ironborn prince easily. 

So what happened in the latest episode of Game of Thrones? Did Daenerys (Emilia Clarke) ever get her baby dragons back? Find out now: 

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WHAT WE LEARNED

Winterfell: Theon didn't get the high praise from his sister, Yara (Gemma Whelan), that he was hoping for. In fact she tells him to leave his newly conquered Winterfell. She also tells him that he was a stupid fool for killing the Stark boys. Yara, you are really growing on us. But before the episode's end we find out what we suspected last week: Bran and Rickon live! And they are hiding right under the nose of Theon. 

North of the Wall: Jon Snow's honor has brought him in chains to the wildling Lord of Bones and caused the deaths of other men of the Night's Watch. But sparing Ygritte's (Rose Leslie) life has helped him keep his head for the moment. Now we are curious about these dragonglass weapons buried in the snow.

Stark Camp: Robb Stark, you are a fool. He's at war and yet finds time to take romantic walks with the foreign nurse girl? We all get that he didn't want this responsibility and family honor is a lot of pressure. And having to arrest your mother for releasing your valuable kingslayer hostage is stressful, but banging Talisa (Oona Chaplin) is definitely a bad idea. No good can come from this. 

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King's Landing: Tyrion (Peter Dinklage) is trying to gear up for Stannis' imminent siege of the city. But Cersei (Lena Headey) seems more interested in hitting Tyrion where it hurts the most, his secret girlfriend. But oops Cersei—you got the wrong girl. Cersei runs so hot and cold, last week we felt sorry for her and this week she is back to conniving and twirling her moustache. Luckily Joffrey (Jack Gleeson) showed up to remind us that he is truly his mother's son. Yep, still a little twat.

Harrenhal: Tywin (Charles Dance) is on the move and it's too late for Arya (Maisie Willams) to use him as her last free-death gift certificate. Arya, being the terribly clever girl she is, says her third name is Jaqen H'ghar (Tom Wlaschiha) himself. She'll only take it back if he helps her escape Harrenhal. It's pretty awesome that Arya, Hot Pie and Gendry (Joe Dempsie) get to stroll through the gates, but we do have to mourn the end of our favorite conversationalist pairs on the show: Arya and Tywin.

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Stannis' Boats: Seems like Stannis (Stephen Dillane) is waging a war and selling his soul for shadow babies basically because of years of bullying from his older brother. Sure there are other factors at play—that whole not actually a Baratheon on the throne thing for one—but really it's decades-long sibling rivalry.

Qarth: Daenerys still is without her baby dragons. Ser Jorah (Iain Glen) pleads with her to leave the city, but she refuses to leave without her children. She also won't listen to the facts of life—says they are the only kids she will ever have. They need to start planning their great Ocean's Eleven-style heist and soon.

ONE-LINERS

"Has anyone told you you're as boring as you are ugly." —Jaime

"I saw the bodies above your gate. Which one gave you a tougher fight, the cripple or the six year old?" —Yara

"Help was not promised, lovely girl. Only death." —Jaqen

"Shut up. Stay here if you are afraid." —Arya

"We're even now, Jon Snow." —Ygritte

"I will hurt you for this. The day will come when you think you are safe and happy and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth. And you'll know the debt is paid." —Tyrion

Did you like this episode? Are you worried about Robb Stark's life choices? Ready for Dany to get her dragons and get into this dogfight? Sound off in the comments!

PHOTOS: Game of Thrones: Season Two

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