Morning Mail! Won't Someone Think of Blue Ivy?!

Readers wonder how new mom Beyoncé is able to hit the town

Dear Ted:
How do new mothers like Beyoncé manage to go out all night to fabulous events like the Met Gala? Not to state the obvious, but she should still be knee-deep in breastfeeding, and the leakage isn't really something she could control all night with her see-through lace sparkle Ice Capade number. Any clue how Hollywood moms manage to evade even the most unavoidable everyday tasks?
—KBrownie

Dear Destiny's Latchkey Child?
Well, she's got plenty of help, K.B. Not only does she have her family (which includes papa Jay-Z and her mom), but she certainly has extra help available if she needs it. Regular parents hire babysitters too, ya know. As for the, uh…lactation issues, I'm sure she had help in that department to make sure there weren't any leaks. Ew.

Dear Ted:
Forget Robert Pattinson in Fifty Shades of Grey (although I love so much that many are on board this train with the rest of us). What about this combination: Rob + Kristen Stewart + Woody Allen + a story set somewhere in Europe? He could totally play their awkwardness. They could even play a couple. How's that for art imitating life?
—Xtina

Dear Midnight in Forks:
Love it! You know I've been rooting for R.Pattz and K.Stew to show off their funny sides, and I think a film with Allen might just be perfect for them. Would love to see how he changes up the Twilight twosome's usual brooding dynamic. And Woody's potential new muse, Lindsay Lohan, could costar, I guess.

Dear Ted:
Does size matter in casting Christan Grey for Fifty Shades of Grey?
—Benson

Dear Measuring Up:
I think it's more about the motion of the ocean, B. That's what prosthetics are for, right? Either way, unless the film's going to nab an NC-17 rating, I wouldn't expect to see too much of mini-Christian.

Dear Ted:
For the person who suggested the reality show with George Clooney's exes, how about "So You Think You Can Outsmart a Celebrity?" and then a "Where Are They Now?" edition, of course. It can be required watching for all young girls arriving in Hollywood.
—Miss P

Dear Elisabetta Explains It All:
Required watching if those babes want to make it in the biz, at least.

Dear Ted:
Continue to love you and your gossip page! I've been hearing rumors, rumblings about a hookup that supposedly happened between Leighton Meester and Ed Westwick at the Met Gala. I don't think it happened, but you let me know, gossip guru!
—Forever Your Fan

Dear All Gossiped Out:
This is hardly the first time these two have been linked, but if you're looking for juicy gossip on the Gossip Girl set, usually Leighton is not involved (just ask Blake Lively or Chace Crawford or even Ed himself). I wouldn't put too much stock in an alleged real-life hookup between Blair and Chuck.

Dear Ted:
How many Blind Vicers were at this year's Met Costume Gala?
—MooKinda

Dear All That Glitters Is Bold:
Jeez…it'd be easier to count how many of the attendees aren't Vice stars. More than I can count on two hands, in all their glittery gold, lacey black and Balenciaga-heeled glory.