It's really enough that the world lost a legend—not to mention several other great talents—this week.
But so much other stuff happened, too, including the eerie reemergence of a long-deceased legend.
And it's all right here...
RIP DICK CLARK: The TV icon who changed the live-broadcast landscape with American Bandstand, his New Year's Rockin' Eve special and the various awards shows his eponymous company produced, died at the seemingly way-too-young age (for him, especially) of 82. Clark's passing resulted in an outpouring of tributes, headed up by the apparent heir to his NYE throne, Ryan Seacrest.
ERASIN' DIXON LINE: Judges' favorite Colton Dixon, one of the few true originals in the bunch, only finished seventh on American Idol. He admitted afterward (if only he had used his best Ron Burgundy voice) that maybe Lady Gaga was a bad choice.
RULES OF ENGAGEMENT: Brad Pitt put a doozy of a diamond (or seven) around fiancée Angelina Jolie's finger, but it's hard to believe he's so proud of himself that he would legally prevent other deep-pocketed gentlemen from making their ladies just as happy.
CALIFORNIA WHAAAT?!: So who caught Tupac Shakur performing with Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre at Coachella last weekend. Wait, whaaat?!
BACK IN ACTION: Demi Moore attended an event for the first time since rehab and her Caribbean vacation. And she's finally acknowledging that she needs a new Twitter handle, pronto!
EVERYBODY OUT!: Amidst a drastic ratings dip, Tyra Banks is cleaning house on America's Next Top Model—Nigel Barker, Jay Manuel and "Miss" J. Alexander won't be coming back. We are not smizing.
MARVELOUS WORK: Judging by early reviews, The Avengers may be just the savior the Memorial Day box office needs.
BLOOD OFFSPRING: Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer, costars in work and life, are expecting their first child together...Melissa Joan Hart and Mark Wilkerson are expecting No. 3...Lamar Odom's dad is under the impression that he's having a grandchild soon.
POSTPARTUM EXPRESSION: Kelly Preston and Hilary Duff could work on playing it closer to the chest, er, vest.
HOSPITAL CORNER: Miley Cyrus needed a trip to the ER after slicing her finger while cooking...The Bee Gees' Robin Gibb is said to be showing signs of awareness, though he remains in a coma, with family at his bedside...
GOODBYES: Levon Helm, drummer and revered voice of The Band, died of throat cancer at 71; Jonathan Frid, Johnny Depp's predecessor in the Dark Shadows role of Barnabas Collins, died at 87...Greg Ham, member of "Down Under"-singing Australian pop group Men at Work, was found dead in his Melbourne home; he was 58.
POLITICAL ASPIRATIONS: Kim Kardashian, who has always spoken proudly of her Armenian heritage, is talking about running for mayor of Glendale, Calif. (which has a large Armenian-American population), someday in the future—or at least continuing to represent her community.
UNHITCHING POST: Who else would Jennie Garth open up to about her divorce other than Ellen DeGeneres?!
BARELY LEGAL: What is Lindsay Lohan doing when she goes out at night? At least, the cops don't seem invested in what she's doing during the day, anyway.
WHAT WOMEN BLOCK: Mel Gibson seems determined to finish his run in Hollywood known as "that guy who's always screaming and saying stupid, scary stuff."
PARIS IN THE SPRING-LOADED TIME: Pippa Middleton had an eventful trip to France, where she went for Vicomte Arthur de Soultrait's 30th birthday—and then a joy-ride that resulted in a fake gun being pulled on the paparazzi.
TURBULENCE AHEAD: Jennifer Hudson and Bar Refaeli both had memorably unpleasant experiences going through TSA security at different airports.
TV LAND: Viewers were reading way too much into Christina Aguilera's seeimingly unenthusiastic reception of Justin Bieber's cheek smooch on The Voice...Sneak peek at this week's Whitney Houston tribute on Glee...Glee graduation gossip...Sheree Whitfield is leaving The Real Housewives of Atlanta...American Horror Story is heading east—to a hospital for the criminally insane, of course!.
RECAPVILLE: Catch up on the week's new episodes of Grey's Anatomy, Survivor: One World, Dancing With the Stars (watch Maria and Derek kiss!), The Voice, Glee, Gossip Girl, Game of Thrones , Mad Men, Celebrity Apprentice and Khloé & Lamar.
SCREEN PLAY: Anne Hathaway and Hugh Jackman are appropriately ragged for Les Misérables...Guy Pearce is steeling himself for Iron Man 3...Water for Elephants helmer Francis Lawrence is first in line to direct Catching Fire...Cannes Film Festival unveils lineup...NYC's Tribeca Film Festival gets underway...Watch the hunktastic trailer for Magic Mike...Read our review of The Lucky One.
MUSICAL NOTES: Not surprisingly, Adele leads the Billboard Music Awards field...Justin Bieber isn't matriculating at Cornell, but Ryan Seacrest Foundation ambassador Selena Gomez gives the project he's doing with Taylor Swift an A...Paul McCartney's "My Valentine" video stars Johnny Depp and Natalie Portman...Madonna admits she could do certain things better, Kanye West changes "Theraflu" to "Way Too Cold."
LAW & DISORDER: LMFAO sued before they have a chance to break up...Nashville group files class-action his-and-hers lawsuit against The Bachelor and The Bachelorette...Anger Management producer sued for $50 million...Basketball Wives' Jennifer Williams sues Evelyn Lozada's assistant...Nicollette Sheridan's case against ABC is scheduled to be retried starting Sept. 10...Johnny Depp sued for security team's alleged bad behavior...Bobby Brown pleads not guilty to DUI.
FASHION FRENZY: Heidi Klum strips for Allure...Check out the celebs' Coachella style...Team USA's Polo Ralph Lauren-designed Summer Olympics wear revealed along with Stella McCartney's togs for Great Britain...Jennifer Morrison went red..
SEEN: Selena and Justin obeying the call of the kiss cam at a Lakers game...Pippa, unarmed, headed to London's Rosano Ferreti's Hair Spa...Adam Levine on the run while shooting Maroon 5's "Payphone" video...Michelle Williams joining new beau Jason Segel at the NYC premiere of The Five Year Engagement...Seemingly on-again Eva Longoria and Eduardo Cruz sharing kisses at the L.A. Zoo...Demi Lovato enjoying bikini weather in Brazil (presumably more than she enjoyed having her hair pulled in Venezuela)...The Jolie-Pitt family taking the engagement party to the Galápagos Islands...Nick Jonas and Ashley Greene walking down the aisle together—at Jonas Brothers bassist Greg Garbo's wedding...Rihanna waving a white flag—oh wait, that's her bikini top—in Hawaii.