Rihanna: Chris Brown Violence "Gave Me Guns"—Plus, Why It's So Hard to Find a Good Guy

Singer also tells Elle magazine she doesn't "have anything to hide" and has "more freedom the more people know" about her personal life

By Rebecca Macatee Apr 04, 2012 6:50 PMTags
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Rihanna's got fame and fortune to spare, but even this Barbadian beauty finds the dating scene challenging.

"I feel like it's hard for everybody," she tells Elle magazine. "I don't think it has anything to do with being famous. There's just a major drought out there. I don't know."

Part of the problem?

"I guess I'm challenging," she admits. "Because my job seems to affect every relationship I have or try to have. Even with people I think should get it, you know? That seems to be a big factor; it's always an issue. But I just need to find the person who balances me out, because then things like my schedule won't matter. I've done it before, so I know I can do it again."

Rihanna also opens up about her infamous romantic ties to Chris Brown, including the 2009 assault. "It gave me guns," she says of the incident. "I was like, well, f—k. They know more about me than I want them to know. It's embarrassing. But that was my opening. That was my liberation, my moment of bring it. I wanted people to know who I am. Whatever they take that to be, good or bad, I just want them to know the truth."

"I have more freedom the more people know about me," she adds. "It's like, one less skeleton in the closet, one less burden, one less secret; now you know that, so you can say what you want about it. I don't have anything to hide."

One thing she hasn't hidden is her reconciliation—at least as pals—with her formerly abusive ex. "The bottom line is that everyone thinks differently. It's very hard for me to accept, but I get it," she says. "People end up wasting their time on the blogs or whatever, ranting away, and that's all right. Because tomorrow I'm still going to be the same person. I'm still going to do what I want to do."

Keep looking for Mr. Right, RiRi. Team Breezy can have C.B. for themselves.