Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson

Dear Ted:  
The boards seem to be cleaned up, as in no psychotic or pornographic Twi-hard nonsense! Hooray! Is this temporary, or is it the fix you've been hinting at?
Reading comments again at last

Dear Glad We Could Help:
Thanks for the shout out, doll, we're still working on the boards and trust, we're listening to all of your concerns—particularly the ones that demean people such as Kristen or anybody else (including ourselves). Expect only more changes to come—I'm just as fed up with the offensive comments as you are. You know the ones that are always anonymous? Cowards!

Dear Ted:
Demi Moore: Very wealthy, three healthy children; many things to be thankful for, to focus on. Instead: self-absorbed, immature, narcissistic, constantly needing attention, jerk. Am I the only one who has no sympathy for her self-indulgent behavior? Really?
Miss P

Dear Moore To Live For:
Wow, P, your words are incredibly harsh considering Dem just began a very painful and public divorce. And remember, divorce is tough on anyone—I think it's unfair to say Demi should suck it up and deal just because she's a celebrity. And as far as your attention-grabbing claims? I completely disagree, Demi hardly wants the attention she's receiving, unlike some other women in this biz.

Dear Ted:
I have a strong suspicion that blacklisting is still alive and kicking during awards season. I'm just not sure what is causing Leonardo DiCaprio to experience the Paul Newman Syndrome (seven noms before he could kiss the bald man's head). Did Leo piss off someone with influence or is my conspiracy theory a bunch of sour grapes?

Dear Where's The Love for Leo:
Even though Leo didn't receive any Oscar love this year, I wouldn't chalk it up to a conspiracy just yet. Thing is, J. Edgar just wasn't that good. In fact, I found it downright boring. And while politics certainly exist in H'wood, I like to think the Academy cares enough to nominate Oscar-worthy material, which sadly, J. Edgar was not.  

 Dear Ted:
Are you trying to give us hints that a breakup is on the horizon for Robsten? I always knew that their "relationship" was a publicity stunt. How do we know that they aren't already broken up now? This "laying low" is crap. Just admit it, they're over!
Still love you anyway

Dear Oh, Really?:
While I have warned you readers to prepare yourselves for the end of Robsten, I still believe the couple is very much together. In fact, I just shot down five reasons you all keep bitchin' as to why the couple's dunzo. Care to throw five more our way?

Dear Ted:  
Us Weekly asked 11-year-old Amara Miller if she thinks George Clooney would make a good father. I like this Amara Miller and let's just hope that Hollywood doesn't taint her gift for speaking the truth. Let's also hope that she remembers her words when in 10 years The George Clooney Red Carpet Escort Agency asks her to come in for an interview. Just say nope. So funny. I still sometimes think George will surprise everyone and get married to a nice, normal woman. Am I just naive?
Miss P

Dear Daddy Georgey?:
I'll level with you on Amara Miller, P—I too, found her phenomenal in The Descendants and the adorable gal is off to a very promising career in H'wood. As for your idea George will settle down and marry? Perhaps you should read Amara's interview again. Even the tween star said George "has fun being an adult." Code for: George enjoys being one of the hottest bachelors in the biz, don't expect it to change.

 Dear Ted:
Have you heard all the Twitter rumors about Kristen Stewart being pregnant? Just rumors right?

Dear Yes:
No!!! Absolutely not!!! She's having quintuplets via in vitro, along with her live-in lovers Ashley Greene and Charlize Theron

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