Is Kate Middleton finally pregnant?
—Annoy Me, via the inbox
Right, right, because the fairy tale is never complete without a prince and a castle and a bay-beeeee. When the infant does arrive, you can bet he will come forth fully outfitted with all his medals and epaulets, and he will be a sight to see. But in the next nine months? According to royal mouthpieces, no.
That's not the only royals-related question I've fielded lately. Anyone feeling like a royal roundup? Here we go ...
Is Pippa Middleton single or not?
—Suc212, via the inbox
Just how much of a bad boy is Prince Harry, I mean, lately?
—S.V., via the inbox
I'd ask the folk of sleepy Gila Bend, Arizona, where the prince is currently engaged in weapons training. (That's not code for anything; he's really learning about weapons. Part of his military training.) A few weeks earlier, the prince reportedly got friendly with a California cocktail waitress, a rebound, perhaps, given that he has split with longtime girlfriend Chelsy Davy. A rumor circulated that the Gila Bend mayor personally warned the prince to behave himself in his territory, but the town manager has denied the story.
Are Kate and Will getting a separation?
—All Woman, via the inbox
I know where this rumor came from: In January the prince reports for a six-week tour of duty in the Falkland Islands as part of his job as a Royal Air Force search & rescue pilot. The mission is considered "classified," which means no spouses allowed, not even the duchess type. Ergo, Mrs. Prince William shall remain behind in Britain.