JUSTIN CAMPBELL/startraksphoto.com; ZUMADear Ted:
You made my '60s-loving heart dance with joy with the Valley of the Dolls info on the TV show! Must pull out my weathered copy of the book to freshen up on my girls! I remember when Lindsay Lohan was favored as a Neely O'Hara casting choice—but I think that is too close to her real life persona. She would make a good Jennifer North. Keep us posted on all you hear on this, Ted!
—FairyGlow
Dear Playing Against Type:
I totally agree, babe. Plus, I don't think Neely was using autotune back in the '60s, whereas Evan Rachel Wood (my chica of choice for the kookoo Ms. O'Hara) has some serious pipes that she needs to show off more. Linds on the other hand has the talent to play no-talent Jennifer North. You follow?
Dear Ted:
I love that there is a Valley of the Dolls remake! It's one of my favorite books and I love the movie, especially your commentary! However, LiLo cannot fill Sharon Tate's shoes. I normally agree with your casting suggestions, but I have to put my foot down on this one. I know Jennifer Lawrence is a busy girl, but I see someone like her in the role of Jennifer North. Not a trainwreck has-been in the making.
—Nic
Dear North by Never Gonna Happen:
J.Law isn't settling down into a TV gig anytime soon—she has a huge blockbuster career to ride on for a while (hello Hunger Games franchise!). Linds might actually take a boob-tube job…If she could book it. And I know it sounds crazy, but let it sink in a bit and it's actually kinda genius.
Dear Ted:
Summertime is coming to an end and it also brings the end of wedding season. With that said, were Carmelita Salami-Climber's friends able to talk her out of her wedding?
—Tiffany
Dear Something Borrowed, Feeling Blue:
Who said she was actually set to walk down the aisle? But Carm's friends haven't convinced her to ditch her dud of a dude yet. It's getting scarily serious.
Dear Ted:
Just wondering, where did all these Jennifer Lawrence-Robert Pattinson rumors come from? I don't understand why people actually believe them considering both are in relationships. Did I miss something (like a possible rumored hangout) or did someone's fantasy pairing just get blown out of proportion.
—C
Dear Duh:
It's the spammers looking for attention. So desperate, no?
Dear Ted:
Any dirt on Michele and Marcus Bachmann?
—MooKinda
Dear Politically Erect:
Just suspicions. Probably the same ones as you.
Dear Ted:
Interesting to know Terry Tush-Trade's unveiling would be the most surprising of the BV reveals. What about Twyla Babe-Sucker? Surprising or no?
—S
Dear Suck On This:
Surprising? More like boring.
Dear Ted:
You are a f--king liar. You told us Rob and Kristen are still together but they are not. They broke up. Kristen is not even doing the UK premiere for Breaking Dawn. She is not doing Paris neither. She wants nothing to do with Rob anymore you liar.
—Lauren
Dear Darling:
Isn't is awful? I've been working from home ever since I heard the news. How are we to go on? What's next? Rob's love child with Nikki Reed? Nikki leaving Paul for Kristen? It's all too much to even think about! I'm simply aghast, I'm never getting out of bed again. Woe is all of us!