I just saw Kanye West's puppet show, the one with Kim Kardashian in a Princess Leia costume. When is it coming to TV?
—Sister H., via the inbox
You speak of Alligator Boots, a half-hour show that dropped Crank Yankers into a blender with King magazine and spun it around until it produced a horny puppet named Beary White.
...other than some strategically placed metal spirals on her boobies. The get-up is, of course, a reference to Return of the Jedi, in which Princess Leia becomes a pleasure-slave for Jabba the Hutt.
Jackhole Productions, the company founded by Jimmy Kimmel and Adam Carolla, was also involved.
Anyway, the pilot featured fully anatomically correct puppets engaging in anatomically specific acts; a barely legal mom puppet who takes her puppet baby to a club; a voyeur puppet pigeon; a put-upon puppet host named Pork; and other characters.
The format looked much like the '70s-era The Muppet Show, with a behind-the-scenes, skit-filled format. In fact, it was even filmed in the same studio as the original Muppets.
It was filmed circa 2008, but some of the pilot is only surfacing now online, courtesy of a fresh release from the show's director, Konee Rock. West clearly had been influenced by Comedy Central's puppet comedy Crank Yankers, which was very popular with rappers such as Eminem.
As for whether you're ever going to see it anywhere other than the Intertubes, probably not. I reached out to Comedy Central, which was considering the show when it was first created.
"We decided not to move forward with the pilot" at the time, a spokesman tells me, but "we also don't publicly discuss reasons for picking up projects or not picking them up."
As for Kanye himself, I Tweeted him but he didn't immediately comment.
One thing is for certain: If Kim Kardashian in an intergalactic slave girl costume can't sell a puppet pilot, nothing can.
Check it out, if you can deal. It's super not safe for work.