What could make for more compelling, wonderful entertainment than watching Nancy Grace and Chaz Bono work the floor on the new season of DWTS? Oh yeah, watching them wrestle in a vat of mac and cheese.
Speaking of dancing, let's traipse into the best of your Soup week.
1. Dancing With the Stars: Every victim of Nancy Grace's televised gavel of vengeance will be overjoyed to know the judge will soon be under judgement herself for offenses on the dance floor. But her first crime is already evident. We submit the evidence...
2. Bachelor Pad: Here's one thing we know: Kasey and Vienna are pretty much the only singles going steady over at the heartbreak hotel known as Bachelor Pad. Here's another thing: Kasey proves his GF devotion with his fingers.
3. Toddlers & Tiaras: Tiny tot Brystol is a veteran pageant winner, and her folks expect nothing less than top honors. But daddy knows what to do if she doesn't bring home the bacon.
4. America's Got Talent: Miami All-Stars dance boss Manny Castro is classy, sincere, likable and passionate. In other words, he has more than enough talent to be your next Commander In Chief. Plus, he's probably American.