Now that the world knows Ashely Hebert chose smilin' older man J.P. over sweaty, unshaven punk Ben, we can go back and review the magic of what went into that big decision.
Namely, Ash's older sister, Chrystie Corns, who uses her experience as a single mother of two, celebrity gossip disher and extreme couponer (check out her deal on pork ribs—sweet!) to offer some searing tough love to her weepy, confused sibling.
And much more hotter. With more tattoos. And more bitterness. And more marriage failure. And more coupons.
And much more hotter. Oh, we said that already.