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Blind Vice Straight Sex

Sorry to be such a downer these days with bad Hollywood relationships galore, not to mention ones that are permanently over. Definitely something in the air—much more so than usual lately.

And, now you can add Lucinda Jones-Smythe and Cubby Asparagus to the endangered couples list. Make that very endangered list.

"He just can't take it, anymore," complained a close friend of Cubby's recently, regarding his pal's dissatisfaction with his marriage. "He's thisclose to ending it—he just feels like he's drowning in her shadow."

Hmmm. Wonder who that could be? Woulda said Marc Anthony, but we sure as hell know what happened there, don't we?!

Cubby's probs, apparently, aren't just emotional, but financial, too: We're told when compared to wife Lucy's far more swimming professional situation, Cubby, just feels like his lack of earning power lately is magnified every time he goes home.

"He's just lost, really," says our mutual friend. "He wants his old life back when they were both really successful, and he just doesn't think it's going to happen while they're together."

Don't give up hope, Cubby, you're such a cute couple! And remember, this is Hollywood. Lucy's movies will be in the toilet in no time and you'll be right back to being top dog!

It Ain't:
Jessica Alba
& Cash Warren, Kelly Ripa & Mark Consuelos, Julia Roberts & Danny Moder