(What does Adele get, by the way? Someone secure that poor child a flying car.)
However, two of those three names are definitely having better year than the third. Take your guesses now (the MTV VMA noms may give you a hint) before I reveal...
With the help of the folks at Billboard, who have all the numbers you'll ever need, and even a few you don't.
We'll start with Gaga. Her album
Like a Prayer Born This Way already has made history this year, when it debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard 200 chart with 1,108,000 copies sold in only its first week. Fewer than 20 albums have achieved that kind of insta-mania since Soundscan started tracking that data in 1991.
But her accomplishments pale like one of her platinum space wigs when compared with Perry or Adele. Perry, in fact, is creeping up on the late Michael Jackson when it comes to a major accomplishment he logged in 1988.
"So far," Billboard associate director of charts Keith Caulfield dishes, "her Teenage Dream album has spawned four No. 1 hits on the Hot 100 chart. Last year she topped the list with "California Gurls," the title track and "Firework." And now in 2011, she went to No. 1 with "E.T." (featuring Kanye West).
"If her latest single, 'Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)' hits No. 1, Perry will become just the second act, and first woman, to score five No. 1s from one album in the chart's 52-year history."
Only one Michael Jackson, with his 1987 album Bad, has scored five Hot 100 No. 1s from one album release. (I know, I know, you were thinking Thriller. Weren't we all.)
Finally, don't discount Adele.
Her latest album has soared among the top three positions in the Billboard 200 albums chart since the second it was released in February. And get this: 21 just recently became the biggest-selling digital album ever, with over 1 million downloads sold, and its biggest single, became the year's best selling digital song, with 4.23 million sold.
See, who needs a whipped cream bra when you have all that to celebrate? All you need is my new podcast, so check it out below: