This was no human trick. But it was definitely stupid.
A wannabe thespian on a late-night bender broke into the historic Ed Sullivan Theater, home to the Late Show With David Letterman, and trashed the lobby early Sunday morning before he was busted by New York's Finest.
We imagine Dave's writing staff is working on a pretty good Top 10 List right about now.
The drunken thespian, identified as 22-year-old James Whittemore, shattered the brass and glass doors at the front entrance, then climbed through and proceeded to wreak havoc inside a vestibule and lobby, overturning garbage cans and tossing velvet rope stands.
"We got a 911 call about 7 a.m. for a burglary in progress. Officers showed up moments later and were met by a witness who called 911 and told them what he had seen and that the suspect was still inside the building," NYPD spokesman James Duffy tells E! News. "The officers saw the perpetrator in the lobby, ordered him to come out, which he did. He crawled back through the safety glass and was arrested without incident."
The whole incident was also captured on surveillance cameras.
Whittemore was charged with one count of burlgary, seven counts of felony criminal mischief and one count of misdemeanor criminal mischief.
"He trashed the front vestibule area and the greater lobby area—a regular-looking office with phones and printers and things like that," added Duffy. "He did not gain access to the theater itself or the Letterman set. Those doors were locked."
The dude caused an estimated $2,000 in damage.
Per the New York Daily News, before his shenanigans, Whittemore—who works as a bartender when he's not appearing in mostly regional theater shows and performing at Six Flags—had reportedly just come from a night of karaoke.
Before he was booked into jail, he was treated at a nearby hospital for a cut on his head.
No word what motivated the break-in save the booze. But may we suggest the gap-toothed comic go with a Top 10 Ways Not to Get Invited on the Late Show With David Letterman? (Extortion would be another one.)
A rep for Letterman said taping for Monday's show would proceed as scheduled this afternoon.