And they didn't.
But, surprisingly, one of the movies actually came out looking good.
Horrible Bosses scored a $28.1 million Friday-Sunday debut, the year's third biggest fourth biggest for a comedy, behind The Hangover Part II, Cameron Diaz's Bad Teacher, as commenters astutely reminded below, and Aniston's and Adam Sandler's Just Go With It.
So, yes, Aniston is now officially back from last summer's The Switch.
And, yes, Jason Bateman, who costarred with Aniston in The Switch and Horrible Bosses, is now officially back from Paul.
As for James' Zookeeper…
The talking-animal romantic-comedy bowed with $21 million, which doesn't sound so bad for a talking-animal romantic comedy, until you read the movie cost as much as $80 million.
Or, more than twice as much as Horrible Bosses.
So, no, James is not officially back from last winter's The Dilemma.
On the upside, polling data showed opening-weekend audiences liked Zookeeper more than critics did.
Which, considering the reviews, wasn't a high bar to clear.
Elsewhere, Transformers: Dark of the Moon ruled for a second weekend, and became the No. 1 domestic hit of the year, breaking $260 million.
The robot sequel continues to be play stronger overseas, as is the way right now, with audiences in South Korea, Russia and more driving the film's worldwide total to more than $550 million, per Box Office Mojo.
For Allen, Midnight in Paris is his biggest box-office hit since forever, or 1986, if you prefer specifics, and Hannah and Her Sisters.
For Wiig, Bridesmaids is her debut blockbuster. The film currently ranks as the year's seventh-biggest domestic hit.
Here's a complete look at the weekend's top-grossing films, per Friday-Sunday estimates as compiled by Exhibitor Relations: