Yes we were just as shocked as the rest of y'all on Tuesday and yes we want Casey Anthony to crawl into a hole and think about what she's (supposedly not) done.
But here's the deal: Much like trainwreck Lindsay Lohan, Case is gonna try her darndest not to go away, and we're still too obsessed with this girl's sketchy story to let her officially guilt-free behind disappear.
So since this crazy lady will have no problem getting us to listen up, how should Casey Anthony use Hollyweird's giganto microphone to tell her story?
Film a Flick!
The movie option is definitely getting the most buzz right now, but guess who's getting the most goss' about playing Casey herself?
A certain Twilight phenom named Kristen Stewart! The Hollywood Reporter's Marisa Guthrie claims she's got "the dark hair" and "sort of the vacant, deer-in-the-headlights look" to pull off the infamous mom.
Hmm, while it's true that K.Stew's got the looks down, we-thinks her acting chops for this kind of role are, well, debatable. Besides, with a flick Case runs the risk of being portrayed in a negative light.
That's why Case may just to do a tell-all book instead. A couple hundred pages will give her plenty of time to explain her shaky side of the story. Besides, O.J. Simpson did it with If I Did It! Well he didn't do it, at least legally...ah well, you know what we mean!
Spill It All on National Television!
Then again, the girl may be too busy celebrating her court victory at various bars to write a whole freakin' book. She could just do an Oprah Winfrey interview for some big bucks and get it all done in a couple of hours.
Make People Pay!
If not, there's always the pay-per-view special option that O.J. was planning on getting to before he, you know, got sent to jail anyway. Case just has to decide how much she wants to charge for her whole spiel.
We're thinking $29.95 a pop?
Just Go Away!
Um, hello? History shows that the girl wouldn't even tell the truth anyway, so why should we care what make-believe story she dreams up. If she had an ounce of dignity, she'd go hide in that hole for real.
But what are we talking about? Casey Anthony doesn't have any dignity, so the choice up to you, Casablancan citizens.
Let's use the Awful Truth's justice system and start voting!