We're not ones to revel in anyone's misfortune, but we think we can speak for women everywhere when we say that we're not exactly heartbroken that George Clooney is back on the market. (A little delusion never hurt anyone, right?)
Though he and, no doubt, Elisabetta Canalis probably are, which is why we'll put a brief moratorium on any forthcoming giddiness and instead focus on what lead to the breakup of this picture-perfect couple.
Here's a breakdown of what led to their sudden (though maybe not so wholly unexpected) split:
July 2009: George and Elisabetta are first spotted together on a PDA-laden tour of Italy, sharing meals and traipsing around his Lake Como home.
September 2009: A couple months after being snapped together, the couple decides to go public and make their official debut appearance as a duo at—rather fittingly—the Venice Film Festival.
December 2009: Bizarrely, George is dragged into the Tiger Woods mess, as one of the golfer's mistresses, Jamie Grubbs, claimed that she carried on a concurrent, clandestine, two-month affair with Clooney while he was with Elisabetta. "He has never met her," George's rep said.
April 2010: Clooney issues a statement denying rumors that the couple has split: "Once again the story is made up, spread to other outlets and now denied. But don't let facts get in the way of a good story."
July 2010: Italian tabloids run rampant with the so-called news that Clooney is planning to wed Canalis. Clooney's rep laughs off the rumors, saying that the reports of upcoming nuptials are "not true."
July 2010: Italy's Corriere della Sera newspaper runs a story linking Elisabetta with a police investigation into an illegal drug and prostitution ring at two Milan nightclubs. A model-turned-escort told the paper she remembered taking cocaine with the Italian TV host and claimed the clubgoers were hired to entertain VIPs in a sexual manner. A source close to Elisabetta told E! News she was "distraught" over the reports and that George was standing by her. She denied ever partaking in drugs or illicit behaviors.
August 2010: Elisabetta gave a lengthy interview to the Italian edition of Vanity Fair from George's Lake Como home. During the chat, Elisabetta gushed over her Romeo and said she had been pampered "like I have never been before" in her relationship. "The idea of being so loved is overwhelming. George has given color back to my life. I feel great, I am happy like I was when I was 18 years old."
August 2010: George's rep is forced to again deny rumors that the couple is engaged after Elisabetta is spotted wearing a conspicuously large bauble on her left hand. Turns out, it was simply a napkin ring.
September 2010: Here we go again: after Elisabetta was spotted wearing a ring (a real one this time) on that finger, rumors surface that the perpetual bachelor finally made a commitment, but George's rep is quick to shoot down speculation that the couple was secretly engaged. "There's nothing to comment on. She likes to wear rings. No more, no less."
January 2011: George appears on Piers Morgan Tonight and is grilled over his marital future. "I was married, so I gave it a shot," he said. "That ought to have proven how good I was at it."
March 2011: George and Elisabetta are named as witnesses in Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi's trial for allegedly paying for sex with an underage girl. He releases a statement through his rep, saying, "It seems odd since I've only met Berlusconi once and that was in an attempt to get aid into Darfur."
May 6, 2011: George turns 50! Elisabetta spills that no big party was being planned.
May 2011: Responding to sources claiming that George was "over" his relationship and "wants to move on," Clooney exclusively denied the rumors to E! Online's Awful Truth, saying, "We are together and doing fine, as far as I can see."
Early June 2011: The beginning of the end? Elisabetta spoke to the Italian weekly magazine Chi, and vowed that she would one day be both a mother and a bride (two things George has made clear he does not anticipate having in his life). "I am a firm believer in marriage, in the future I will be married," she said. "But for the time being I am happy as I am, I don't need anything to confirm how happy I am."
June 15, 2011: George and Elisabetta are seen sharing a seemingly romantic, candlelight dinner at Restaurant Il Gatto Nero near his Lake Como home. George was on a break from filming Gravity in London with Sandra Bullock.
June 22, 2011: George and Elisabetta release a joint statement confirming that they've called it quits. "We are not together anymore," they told E! News. "It's very difficult and very personal and hope everyone can respect our privacy."