Bitch Back! Are Robsten on the Rocks?

Readers are super concerned over the status of Rob and Kristen’s relationship

Dear Ted:
So what's up with Robsten? You are awfully quiet, and I rely on you for the truth. Are they or aren't they "taking a break"?
—M

Dear Robsten Rumors:
Take a deep breath, Twi-hards, Robsten is so not on the rocks. We've reported this, what, 262,523 times already? As usual, the rumors are due to scheduling differences, but this is not the first time the couple have been apart. They are very into letting each other have their own careers and lives, so it will take more than a little long distance to break these two up. 

Dear Ted:
Is Robert Pattinson shallow when it comes to looks and women or is he more about personality?
—W

Dear Down-to-Earth Dude:
Rob, shallow? Absolutely not. This dude is so down-to-earth and very committed when he's in a relationship. K.Stew may be gorgeous, but there is a lot more to her than just looks, and Rob knows it.

Dear Ted:
Are Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart in an open relationship, or is it completely exclusive to each other?
—W

Dear In It to Win It:
These two are too smart to mess around with some kind of a way-open multirelationship. Charlie Sheen, they're not.

Dear Ted:
Everyone asks about the guys of Glee and if they're Vicey. I was wondering how many of the girls of Glee, besides Lea Michele, have a Blind.
—T

Dear Glee-ful:
Plenty. This crew spends every second together, and that makes it impossible to be anything but deliciously Vicey. 

Dear Ted:
Sally Pearlsmyth and Percy DuBois, could they be Blake Lively and Penn Badgley?
—Tabitha

Dear Gossip-y Vice?
Great guess, but no. Think less fashion-y than Blake. A lot.

Dear Ted:
Please, please, please tell me the rumors Taylor Swift and Garret Hedlund dating are just that. Talk about an odd match. I can see why she would be into him, but I can't see why he would date her...and not for the physical reasons as she is too adorable. He just seems, I don't know, too manly for her. You know what I mean?
—Tinamarie

Dear Country Couple Strong:
The rumors of them actually dating? Yet to be confirmed. But the rumors of the two of them dining together? So very true, yet it was their first time out together. Stand by. And let Taylor date a manly man if she wants!

Dear Ted:
Did anyone consider Catherine Zeta-Jones to be the new Cleopatra?
—C

Dear Not So Sure:
Catherine is an interesting suggestion, and she does have the exotic look. But as we have said before, this role needs someone who will entirely embrace the character, preferably a bit younger, and we just don't know if CZJ is right on both scores.

Dear Ted:
Let's cast the other two important roles for Snow White and the Huntsman: I'm throwing my vote for prince charming to either Zac Efron or Jake Gyllenhaal. Prince charming is brunet and pretty, and so are they. As for the huntsman, could we give Matthew McConaughey a chance please?
—Ali

Dear Yum:
Those are some delicious choices for both roles! We think Zac Efron and Kristen Stewart would definitely bring it chemistry-wise. As for McConaughey? This could be a great break from romantic comedies, but still not sure if he can pull it off. 

Dear Ted:
Could you pretty, pretty please give me some new hint toward the identities of Judas Jack-Off and Dash Dingled-Dream so that I can start over trying to solve this one. My palette needs cleansing because it keeps going to the same place.
—Mike

Dear Goss Gourmet:
Get a new diet, babe, those guys are disappearing faster than LeAnn Rimes' body.

Dear Ted:
Never thought I'd inquire but haven't seen these guesses and my curiosity and little patience has gotten the best of me: Are Strippa-Rip Ya and Caesar Anchovy-Arse Brooke Burke and David Charvet? Apologies in advance if these guesses were already proposed.
—Nina

Dear Strippa-sessed:
No, not even close, really. Though a very interesting angle. Think far more star wattage.

Dear Ted:
Do you think that Alex Pettyfer is more into himself than anything, almost selfishly so? As in, do you think he would put his career before anything. I'm sure you can guess why I'm asking...Thanks.
—Jenn

Dear Sneaky:
I know where you're going with this one, and would it surprise you to know you're not entirely correct?

Dear Ted:
I won't stop bugging you until you answer me: Is Tom Welling still married? Begging for answer.
—Michelle

Dear Welling-ly Wed:
Yes, he is still married to model Jamie White. They have been married since 2002 and currently reside in Vancouver, British Columbia. Of course, when you're off in Canada, who the hell knows what you're up to, right?

Dear Ted:
Is Cookie Muncher Alessandra Ambrosio?
—B

Dear Crumbles:
Nope. Though they have something distinctly in common.