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Charlie Sheen, Two and a Half Men

Robert Voets/CBS

The man has conquered Twitter, Ustream and the sitcom world—and keeps winning! So it's no surprise that Charlie Sheen would also be, duh, not losing, when it comes to ticket sales for his comedy tour, "My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat Is Not an Option" (yeesh!). 

Sorry to break the news folks, but if you didn't snag tickets for his live show yet, you're S.O.L. They're sold out!

The actor tweeted today: "Fastball; Detroit/Chicago sold out in minutes... Thanks to Sheen's Cadre..! #WINNING c."

And though we might question whether it really is Charlie behind that Twitter account, Ticketmaster confirms that the Detroit and Chicago shows are sold out.

If you're wondering who would produce this guy's comedy show, well, Live Nation would. But then again, they also gave him a machete, so they're clearly not risk-averse.

The possibility of more shows being added doesn't seem too unlikely, so if you weren't fast enough this time around, you may still have a chance to hear the stories from the Warlock himself, live!