Now that we have your attention.
Smartwater pitchwoman null has released her first-ever viral video, cagily calling it her "sex tape."
While there's no actual action of that that sort in the clip, it does feature lots of Internet-meme favorites like Keenan Cahill, a plethora of puppies, the Double Rainbow guy, creepy dancing babies and...
...Chelsea Lately's own Brad Wollack, who receives a lovely boot to the crotch, courtesy of Ms. Aniston herself.
And who wouldn't toast a Smartwater to that?