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All-New Soup Tonight!

Joel McHale, The Soup E! Networks

In tonight's fresh pot of fresh pot...

As Egypt devolves into a sandy hell of bloodshed and chaos, Entertainment Tonight reminds us of the poor soul who's suffering the most: Angelina Jolie... 

American Idol heads to Austin, Texas where the contestants inform us that they're 100% straight, even if they do 100% suck...

The Bachelor's Brad Womack eliminates Ashley from the show, and The Bachelor's producers eliminate any compassion from their hearts...

Bridalplasty mercifully comes to an end, society no doubt soon to follow...

And Curb Your Enthusiasm's Jeff Garlin pops in to show Joel how his clothes look on a real body...

Bathe in this batch tonight at 10pm ET/PT!

VIDEO:  And until then, soothe your tired and aching funny bone in this clip from last week's show.

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