It's been an uncomfortable year, scandal-wise, in Hollywood. Usually, it's just a slam-dunk scenario like some shmuck cheated (David Boreanaz, anybody?) or a really horrible man showed his true colors (Mel Gibson in all his evil glory). End of story, really.
But other unsettling controversies can't be solved so easily, like who the hell killed Ronni Chasen? And what in the world is up with Ashton Kutcher? Is wife Demi Moore the only one lowering his zipper at night?
Let's find out:
1. Did Ashton Cheat? Sometimes actions speak louder than words, right? When Demi and Ashton snuggled on Twitter as a result of allegations that Mr. Moore had stepped out on his older wife with a younger woman, it was...weird. Possibly overly defensive? And now that Ashton's accuser, sex-tape wunderkind Brittney Jones, is auctioning a sweater she insists is leftover evidence of her affair with the boyish star, what's next? Even though Ashton has been adamant he didn't have an affair with Jones, surely it's not going to be left at that? Regardless, this sordid story's going to unthread much more than a sweater before it's finally answered, trust.
2. Is Miley Becoming the New Lindsay? When Miley Cyrus's backstabbing, videotaping "friend," Anna Oliver, showed the world that Miley likes to smoke strange substances, what the world had been suspecting about the Disney darling not being so perfect was confirmed. But the question was: Will it get worse, since mom Tish seems more an enabler than a parent and since Billy Ray split, does he feel helpless to guide his little girl? He even declared Miley's "sad" occurrences are "beyond my control." Oh, jeez, This has the all the familiar makings of Michael Lohan and Dina Lohan at odds over their party-bent daughter, who just gets worse with each tabloid update.
3. When Did Sandra Bullock Find Out Jesse James Had Strayed? It had barely been a week since Sandy took home her Oscar for Best Actress when the tabloids dropped a bombshell on us. That would be Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, the first woman who came forward selling all kinds of dirty deets about her sexy time with James. But how long did Sandy know? Before tabloids go to print, they have to request comment and go through heaps of legal hoops. It would appear, then, that Sandra knew what was coming toward the end of awards season—and seemingly at the Oscars. If so, give the girl a second Best Actress prize. You never woulda known.
4. Does America Really Like Bristol Palin? Everyone likes to laugh at Sarah Palin, but was the joke on us when it came to her daughter on Dancing With the Stars? Tea Party conspiracy aside, seriously, how did Bristol—who once danced in a monkey suit—really make it to the final round? Either there are far more Republicans among us than we know, or Dancing producers finagled it for Bristol to remain on the show, just to boost ratings. They've denied this, of course, but let's face it, the Dancing execs would have been idiots not to have at least considered such genius plotting.
5. Who Ordered Ronni Chasen's Murder? They were the five shots heard round the world, when well-known Hollywood publicist Ronni Chasen was brutally gunned down early in the morning on Nov. 16, in Beverly Hills. Tinseltown was shocked that one of its own was so coolly offed in one of the fanciest neighborhoods in the world. And the community was even more shocked by the Beverly Hills Police Department's near-laughable explanation that it was all due to a "botched robbery." Oh, really? Complete with hollow-point bullets, each precisely aimed at Chasen's heart and nothing removed from the wealthy, bejeweled woman's Mercedes, like her expensive handbag? Plus, her own friggin' brother says it was a simple case of "road rage"? Somebody's lying here. And a lotta somebodys are not speaking up.
Oh, and here's our bonus question for 2011:
How Much Longer Will Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie Last? Even though we think Dr. Drew needs to shut the ef sometimes (especially when talking about people he doesn't know and who aren't his patients), can't say we disagree with some of his recent statements to The Huffington Post. Like how Brad and Angie constantly create things to keep it together and how things don't look good for the beautiful twosome—at all. We've only been saying this for, like, ever.
Sounds like a lot of Hollywood couples we know who have since bitten the dust, huh?