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    Morning Piss! Say Good-bye Already, Oprah!

    Oprah Winfrey Harpo Productions/ Getty Images

    We can handle a lot—trust, we lived through Gyllenspoon—but enough is enough.

    We're finally fed up with some par-tick Hollywood nonsense. Yep, we're looking at you, Oprah. Is that not who you thought we'd be PO'd at today? Well, as much as we love the boisterous broad, we think her head is getting too big for even herself.

    Shocker, huh?

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    See, we'll miss Oprah and her show as much as the next Oprah fan (which we are), but it's not like she's going to disappear. She's starting her own friggin' network, after all. If anything, we'll probably get more Oprah time.

    So all this hoopla over her final season is starting to annoy us. A lot.

    We heart O's Favorite Things, and we laughed when the audience practically had heart attacks over cashmere sweaters and Volkswagen Beetles, but we'd rather Oprah celebrated her final season by doing what she does best: Touching people's lives.

    Whatever, maybe we're corny, but that's what Oprah does like nobody else.

    So get real. We know you're besties with Tom Cruise and half of Hollywood, Winfrey, but that doesn't mean Hugh Jackman's life has to flash before his gorge Aussie eyes for one of your more unnecessary, attention-grabbing stunts.

    We're sure people will weep when they see you whether you're Down Under in the Sydney Oprah House (really?) or back in the studio doing the heartfelt chatfest thing.

    So how about we make a deal, Oprah? Bring it down a notch with all this so-long crap and we won't bring up any of those lesbian rumors for a while.

    We know that'll make you happy because you're "not even kind of a lesbian."

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