I absolutely adore Chris Pine. You never seem to mention him in your column, so could it be that he's one of the more normal, well-adjusted young Hollywood stars? Or is he just better at hiding his Vices?
Dear Good Eye:
We love us some Chris Pine too, not only because he's way deelish, but because he's so not Hollywood. Pine isn't in the Biz just to be famous, hence that's why his relationship with Olivia Munn lasted about two seconds. Why that gal messed that one up is totally beyond us. Hello? BF perfection, people!
I am the proud owner of Skittles, the rescue lab, and he is eager to know: Are you implying that Nevis Divine regularly uses the nose candy, rather than a one-time experimentation? And do his beard or Barrington ever partake in that, or any other kinds of illegal substances, together?
No, no Nevis is definitely not a druggie. You will never find N or B patrolling Hollywood clubs for coke, but that's not to say they haven't dabbled in it before. Or will again.
So Brangelina are the happiest couple in T-town, huh? Just a few months ago you were telling us just how dysfunctional they are. I think they stay together because of the fact that they immaturely popped out/adopted too many children before getting to know each other well enough. Brad Pitt seems like the kind of guy who needs a woman to look after him. Totally not the bachelor type. And she looks completely skeletal. Perhaps they both worry that starting over as singles with six kids would be too hard? Are they seriously so content with each other? They can't seem to do anything together without a camera crew to document all the happy moments.
Dear Trouble for Two:
That's happy by Hollywood terms, darling. Brad and Angie have their sexy routine down pat—he loves playing manny, and A.J. still gets to try everything she would have, with or without a bundle of kids. Angelina isn't going to want to let that go anytime soon, and Pitt doesn't want to go anywhere. Here's hoping Angie doesn't get sick of her longest role to date: playing house.
Just watched Lars and the Real Girl—only Ryan Gosling could pull that role off. Since you talk of him in your column, I decided to Google him. If true, the dude is a second-born, home-schooled, Canadian Mormon who took a few years off to sing in a very dark sounding band. All right, Ted, my context clues are definitely saying there is more to this guy than the gym and biceps. Please give us more on all things Gosling. Spill. What is he like in real life? Does he party?
Dear Right in the Wrong Ways;
Ry-guy is way more hipster than Hollywood. He's definitely a little funky, not the typical Hollywood playboy you would expect. Yes, he has gotten his party on. Sometimes pretty heavily, too. And think more on the Robert Pattinson spectrum than Jake Gyllenhaal, who is getting himself linked to every T-town babe in sight. But just because Gosling flies under the radar doesn't mean he doesn't have some cork in him.
What's Jerry Menage-e-No been up to these days? Will she ever come out publicly, or does she still think that her career will be affected? Would she be willing to do what Anna Paquin did?
Dear Nice Try:
Few babes have Paquin's guts—or insight. Certainly not Jerry, who will wither away in her indecision, I fear.
What happened to all the scoop about John Travolta's sitch? Only a few weeks back, it seemed like there was a tidal wave of innuendo flying around—he was all over the front page of the National Enquirer, all the blogs were racing to dish, and you were telling us about how Seymour Plow-Me-More would have reacted in the same situation. Yet now it's all suddenly gone quiet. Can this be explained scientifically?
Dear Easiest One Yet:
It's called Scientology.
In what state does Baby Tile live? Does he or she live with Toothy or Gray Goose?
Dear One Big Toothy Family:
More than one.
Why so much hate on Ashley Greene? Do you honestly think she's a bad person, always seeking for attention? Do you really think she's a man-eater? Do you honestly still think her relationship with Joe Jonas is a PR move? It's not that I love her or admire her that much, but I've seen in a recent Bitch-Back someone calling her "Trashley" and I think that's kinda too harsh and lame.
Dear Team Alice:
Don't get your Twi-panties in a bunch, we love love Ash. Big fan of the sexy gal! Just not feeling the Joe Jonas matching—whom we love separately as well. We just so prefer Robsten's chill way of doing things Gronas' slobberfests everywhere.
I love you, I do, but your misinformation about Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder is killing me and I finally had to write! It worries me that you really don't know the things you're telling us (but if that means you're also wrong about Skarsgård, I'm in heaven). I have a friend that works on Vampire Diaries and they are so doing it. On the sly (sort of), since that means cheating, but doing it none the less. Truth.
Dear Source War:
First off, babe, both the delish Diaries stars are single, so even if they were getting freaky between takes, it wouldn't be cheating. That said, not only does our on-set source work very (and I mean very) closely with these two in par-tick, but he parties with them, too. And they are not hooking up, sorry.
What has Misha Mayhem been up to lately? Still partying? And does she party alone or only with Morgan?
Dear Nice Try:
Did I ever say Misha was a girl? Misha isn't in the scene as much as he or she once was, no. And that's a good thing!
While I'm so happy for Willow Smith's smash single, "Whip My Hair," I'm reading a lot of negative comments about Nicki Minaj's remix version not being lyrically and age appropriate. Have you heard anything from Will and Jada's Camp?
Dear Meet the Smiths:
We have a feeling Will and Jada don't care—they couldn't be more thrilled that they have another star in the making. Especially since it wasn't an official remix, someone just added an old Nic verse to W's smash. Dare we say Willow is the most talented of the Smiths? Too bad, already typed it.