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Soup Top 5: Bret Michaels Daughter Demands Rockin' Reincarnation

The Interweb is abuzz with reports of a time-traveling woman discovered in a1928 Charlie Chaplin film talking on a cell phone. Sources claim she was saying, "Yeah, The Soup is much funnier than this Chaplin crap!"

Start reading the best of last week, and you can find out for yourself.

1. Bret Michaels: On Life As I Know It, aging wiseman uses death by motorcycle to teach his young daughter Jorja about life (when he should be teaching her about spelling). Couldn't she have learned a lot more about tragedy from a night on the Rock of Love bus?

More after the jump!

2. David Arquette: After a fling with a young honey, affable goofball Dave is all tore up over his wrenching split from longtime wife Courteney, and is taking appropriate reconciliatory measures. He's opening a nightclub. Filled with young honeys.

3. The Real Housewives of Atlanta: What does a real housewife in a certain southern town do when her dog is too fat? If you guessed it involves alcohol and liposuction, you're right. Of course, that's the answer to most problems on TRHOA.

4. 19 Kids & Counting: Thrills abound in the life of the Duggars, who have more kids than the guy with four wedding rings on Sister Wives. Find out where mommy took the tribe for a special treat. And make sure you're sitting down!

5. Wendy Williams: Harsh Wendy has no sympathy for slutty, mom-freaking-out Angelina, the Jersey Shore cast member who left the show early. Come on, shouldn't she at least get credit for that?

PHOTOS: Why Bai Ling in Wacky Outfits? Why not?

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