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    Chelsea Handler's VMA Plans: No Sex...at Least Not Onstage

    Chelsea Handler Frank Micelotta/MTV

    Come this Sunday, when Chelsea Handler makes her debut as host of MTV's Video Music Awards, she probably won't sing, wants to stay far away from Justin Bieber, but could end up making out with 50 Cent.

    And then there's that part of her body she's looking forward to showing off because she doesn't get to do it on her late-night chat show here at E!, Chelsea Lately.

    I caught up with the funnylady earlier today during rehearsals for the big show…

    Who are you looking forward to making fun of?
    I don't know. We're still working out all the kinks so we don't really know yet.

    Someone like Justin Bieber?
    No. I mean, that's a sensitive topic for me because of my past with him. I don't even want to go there. I don't want to even give him the satisfaction of talking about him.

    Are you going to be making out with any girls on the VMAs?
    Onstage? I usually do it after. I get in enough trouble on air so anything I want to do sexually, I'll do it offstage. Unless the show's really not doing well then I just have pull that out.

    Who would you want to make out with?
    Maybe 50 Cent.

    I mean, which woman would you want to make out with?
    Well, 50 Cent is like a woman. He was in prison for a while, so he could have been a woman while he was in prison.

    Are you going to sing during the show?
    I don't know if that would be a nice thing to do to the audience.

    If you did, who would you sing with?
    Justin Bieber. But it would have to be very very far away from him because seeing him up close and personal is just too hurtful.

    What happened between the two of you?
    You know what happened, Marc. We were in a relationship. I don't want to talk about it publicly.

    How many outfit changes will you have?
    Probably four or five.

    You going to show some skin?
    Yeah, I'm going to show some leg. In my show, I can't really show my legs off because I have to sit down and a skirt kind of rides up, so I'm going to show off my legs.

    Joe Manganiello from True Blood is coming on Sunday. Have you ever seen him in person?
    No.

    He's really hot.
    Really? Maybe you should introduce yourself to him. Maybe he likes a man in a bow tie.

    Have any advice for what Kanye West and Taylor Swift should do on Sunday?
    I don't really have advice that anyone would take seriously, but they're going to have to do something so people stop talking about it and take the air out of it.

    Do you want them to make out?
    You want everyone to make out. I don't want Taylor to make out with Kanye. That would be awful.

    Do you want to make out with Taylor?
    I don't want to make out with Taylor. She's too young for me.

    How much vodka will you drink before the show?
    I don't usually drink before something big. I'll drink maybe afterward or toward the end but not before I go onstage. We'll have to see what kind of mood I'm in.

    Did you drink when you were in a relationship with Justin Bieber?
    I couldn't. That was one of the problems with our relationship.

    He wanted to drink?
    Uh-huh.

    ________

    For all your MTV VMA scoopage, follow @marcmalkin on Twitter and Facebook.

    Marc's got the red carpet covered in his Twitpics photo gallery.

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