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    Bitch-Back! Did Lindsay Want to Go to Rehab?

    Lindsay Lohan David McNew/Getty Images

    Dear Ted:
    Something just occurred to me watching the whole Lindsay Lohan sitch. She's apparently broke, with no insurance. The 90 days in rehab are paid for by the state, no? I was just thinking, maybe she wanted to get in front of a judge to get the help she needs but just didn't count on actually having to do jail time. That's why she was crying. Am I right?
    —Jeff

    Dear Lo-Planned Out:
    Jeff, remember we're talking about Lindsay here—a gal who never thinks she does anything wrong and will always blame someone else when she gets caught. Linds thought she would march right out of Revel's courthouse with, at most, a slap on the wrist. La Lohan still doesn't want the help that (we all know!) she needs.

    Dear Ted:
    Shia LaBeouf
    and Carey Mulligan are such an odd couple, don't you think? I don't think they'll last. Will they?
    —Ailish

    Dear Cutesy Couple:
    Really, A? Team Awful totally loves these two together—the real deal, for sure! Plus, they're not as mismatched as you may think; they definitely compliment each other. Carey is a catch too, so Shia had better hold onto her.

    Dear Ted:
    What is the deal with Summit making us wait a year after the first part of Breaking Dawn for the second part? Even the Harry Potter producers are only waiting six months between Deathly Hallows parts one and two. Aren't they filming both parts at once?
    —Susan

    Dear You Got Summit-ed:
    If you haven't figured out by now how much Summit loves to take its time tinkering with these flicks and dragging out the anticipation, then you are in for a very harsh few years, Sus. But then again, don't you want it to last longer? How sad will it be to bid adieu to Edward Cullen!

    Dear Ted:
    Had Brad Pitt and Gwyneth Paltrow been married or together at the time of Mr. & Mrs. Smith, instead of Brad and Jennifer Aniston, would Angelina Jolie still have managed to lure Brad away?
    —DS

    Dear Goop Be Gone:
    Yep. Ange gets what she wants. Actually, Jen had a better chance at surviving the Smiths, come to think of it.

    Dear Ted:
    I was a Robsten believer, but now I find it hard to believe that they would go this long without seeing each other. They seemed like they were crazy about each other and always found a way to be together. So now I'm thinking something had to have happened. What do you think?
    —AW

    Dear Hello!
    It's the 21st century, everyone! Welcome, I'd like to introduce you to this crazy invention called a telephone! And we have webcams too! And like a gajillion other electronic gadgets that people keep in touch on when they know they have to be apart for work. Also airplanes!

    Dear Ted:
    Dawn Ostroff
    of the CW has said that Supernatural might possibly get a season seven if the ratings hold up, which leads me to believe that stars Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki have both signed on the dotted line. I'm wondering, though, since they both seem to be at good career points to pursue leading-man roles, if anything needed to be added to the pot to get them locked in. Jensen was given an episode to direct this season, so maybe that was one of his perks. But what about Jared? My thought is that he wanted less time on the set so that he could be free to pursue movies and/or spend time with his new wife. Do you have any insight?
    —Ambitious J

    Dear Just Natural:
    I don't think the CW has to try too hard to rope these two into another season. While the duo may be working their way toward leading-men status, they're still relatively stuck in TV limbo. Why gamble when they can ride on their Super stardom a bit longer?

    Dear Ted:
    I had never even heard of Joe Manganiello until you posted that smokin'-hot pic of him. Looking through his filmography he has done a lot of guest roles and direct-to-DVD movies. Do you think this is his big break, or will he go back into oblivion once True Blood is over? And even though he is not an A-lister, does he have any Blind Vices?
    —P

    Dear Six-Pack to Stay:
    No Vices for this one—but with those abs and drop-dead-gorge looks, how long do you think that will last, especially since I don't seem him going anywhere anytime soon. Met the dude, and I see him blasting into stardom, trust.

    Dear Ted:
    Is it just me or has Alexander Skarsgård's popularity gone down since he started hooking up with Kate Bosworth?
    —J

    Dear Boringsworth:
    Don't think the dude's popularity necessarily is taking a hit (he's still hotter than ever on True Blood), but this relaysh is a total dud. We need to get this Single Skars petition started officially. Can you help?

    Dear Ted:
    How often on-the-set affairs happen? I am not just talking about movie sets, but on TV network sets. Those stars have to get pretty close on those long hours, and if the show is long-running, they can be bonded together ("in secret") for years. Are they as crazy and scandalous as they seem, or are sets just as normal and boring (not to mention disappointing) as people say? If they do happen, how are they not more out in the open?
    —Leila

    Dear Set Snoop:
    Define affair. Sure, costars canoodle (and more) between takes—sometimes the muy caliente chemistry just carries over. But what's far more interesting are the costars who want you to think they're getting it on when the director yells "cut!" But don't be fooled, they so aren't.

    Dear Ted:
    With all due respect, do you expect us to believe that for the last five years Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens have signed a contract to pretend to be lovers just so the public wouldn't suspect his sexual orientation? First, they both deserve Oscars, have you seen the way they look at each other when they're alone in candid? Next, he could date a different girl everyday to keep up the ruse. Finally, I for not one second think that Zac Efron is gay, he is way too much of a flirt. He's way too smart to stay with someone because of a contract and your basically calling for being paid to be a beard. Unless you have absolute proof I don't think you should insinuate things that can destroy these young, nice, actors' careers. Thank you.
    —A Fan

    Dear Assuming:
    These two like each other; I never said otherwise. And I certainly never mentioned a "contract"—how very Tom-and-Nicole conspiracy theory of you! Plus, I don't think little-old me is going to hurt either of their red-hot careers. Well, Zac's anyway.

    Dear Ted:
    I was always a big fan of Jake on the Bachelorette, so I was happy when he was chosen as the Bachelor. When I watched the breakup special, I was surprised at how angry, rude and controlling he acted. I never liked Vienna, but I found myself feeling bad for her. Was it all just a nice-guy act for the cameras? Would people on the set say that he wasn't as nice as he appeared?
    —xoxo

    Dear Bachelor Bomb:
    It's a shame he's so sexy but has such a nasty ‘tude. But it doesn't surprise me either. These two feed off of each other's drama. It was bound to be a dating disaster from the start.

    Dear Ted:
    In your answer about your favorite all-Americans, I just wanted to correct you, Ryan Gosling is Canadian—sorry can't claim him. He's ours. Along with Rachel McAdams and Anna Paquin (before she moved to N.Z.). Just to set the record straight.
    —Annoyed Cannuck

    Dear Canada Corrected:
    Nice try. We're taking him back.

    Dear Ted:
    Actually you've referred to Terry Tush-Trade has both a "she" and a "he," but most recently you've, been referencing her as female. Is this person possibly a guy instead and we've just been looking at this all wrong?
    —IP

    Dear Trade-Off:
    Terry is just so complex, huh?

    Follow @theawfultruth on Twitter!

    _______

    Plenty more bitchin' in our Bitch-Back! section. Check it out!

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