UPDATE: Good luck finding a jury who can abide by it, but the judge in James' suit has just approved his request to play fair, barring any slights on his character or talk about his scandalous not-so-distant past from entering arguments in his civil case against a clothing company.
Jury selection begins on June 9, 2010.
Which is why his attorneys today filed a new motion in his years-old clothing suit, asking that his accusers be forced to play fair in court.
In other words, no name-calling.
Here's the deal: Back in 2008, James partnered to launch America's Brand work wear in Wal-Mart. He pulled out at the last minute, dumped his partner and launched the line anyway under his name. Or so goes the allegation by the fuming ex-partner who now wants a cut of the profits.
In the papers filed this month in Los Angeles Superior Court, James' lawyers said that they anticipate the accuser "will attempt to introduce improper character evidence that is irrelevant, and highly prejudicial, and other incendiary evidence."
They're seeking to preemptively ban such dirty talk "upon the grounds that the evidence would be irrelevant, immaterial, prejudicial and inadmissible under the laws of this state."
So what kinds of "purported personality traits...regarding family life" does he want stricken from the record? Well, for those of you who've spent the last few months under a rock, here are the no-go areas:
• Any mention of any alleged mistresses
• Any mention of the words Nazi or Nazis
• Any photographs that relate to, or contain, Nazis or Nazi uniforms
• The phrase "most hated person in America"
• The allegation of an untruthful character
• Any mention of the movie The Blind Side
• The terms "monster," "skin head," "racist" or "homophobe"
• Sandra Bullock, or any films or photos featuring her
• Rumors or gossip about pregnancies
• Adoption matters
• Any mention of the terms prostitute, cheating or cheater
• Any mention or photographs of Michelle "Bombshell" McGee
James' lawyers claim the above items are not relevant to the case and, if they become part of it, would bring with them "substantial danger of undue prejudice" to James.
"Jesse James' family and personal lives have been the subject of extraordinary media and public attention, a great deal of which involves rumors, gossip and innuendo," the papers state. "None of these matters have any relevance."
The next hearing on the matter is set for June 3.
At which point James may have a new place of residence. E! News confirms that the embattled Monster Garage host is selling the Huntington Beach home he shared with Sandra Bullock (and before her, Janine Lindemulder), and that the two-bedroom, 2.5-bath, 3,600-square-foot property was assessed at nearly $3.5 million back in 2006.
James is reportedly looking to resettle in the Bullock-friendly area of Austin. Let the rumors begin continue.
—Additional reporting by Whitney English
Our gallery of Jesse James' Classy Ladies is exactly the sort of thing he wants to keep out of court. Check it out!