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    Bitch-Back! Who Is Chely Wright?

    Chely Wright Stephen Lovekin/Getty Images

    Dear Ted:
    Just saw all the hype about Chely Wright coming out of the closet and my first reaction, as a country music fan is this: Who? Is that why she came out? Because she has a book and a CD coming out as well? What do you think?
    —Cristina

    Dear Perfect Timing:
    Yes, she came out just in time to peddle her products. Maybe some of the Real Housewives should try this tactic to sell theirs...but, good luck, girlfriend!

    Dear Ted:
    OK, Lindsay Lohan as Linda Lovelace? As soon as I read this, I wondered what you thought. I see it could go either way. It's either the comeback of Robert Downey Jr. proportions or it will totally suck. What are your thoughts? Will she get an Oscar or a Razzie?
    —Erin

    Dear Drastic Moves:
    Signing on to any role these days is big news for Lindsay, darling. And you're right, this could be her big comeback or her not-so-graceful exit from the spotlight. But we're going to have to wait to see who else signs on to the project before we can decide. Oh, and we think L.L. shares more in common with Linda Lovelace than their initials, but that's a different story.

    Dear Ted:
    Here in the U.K. there have been reports that Glee's Lea Michele is really not so nice. And I'm seriously hoping that's not true, as she seems like a good person and role model, not to mention she is supertalented. So tell me, is Lea nice or not? And is she friends with the rest of the cast of Glee?
    —Sunshine

    Dear H.S. Drama:
    I plead the fifth. We sure heart her, though! Think the cast does, too. Most days.

    Dear Ted:
    I hope you're having a lovely week. Right now I have two adorable dogs sound asleep while I type away on my computer. Anyway, I want to ask a Robsten question. Now we all know they're together, they're not going to say anything because they don't have to. I do have to ask, do you think the other reason why they don't just admit it is because if they do decide to break up, it's an easy break? I mean they don't have to confirm a breakup if they don't confirm a relationship, makes it much easier (maybe more celebs should take notice).
    —Sam

    Dear Clean Break:
    True, not acknowledging their sparks to the press makes it easier to navigate the complicated world that is young love, but it doesn't do us fans any good! Guess we'll have to settle for Twitter reports of their airport cuddle sessions. And A.T. updates, of course!

    Dear Ted:
    Hey there, boyfriend! John Mayer's lady-killing ways are old news by now, but I'm wondering if all the sound and fury of "sexual napalm" could have more of a whiff of distraction. I saw him live (a friend won tickets plus meet & greet!) ages ago when his career was just heating up. At that time, he was a no-name. My friend and I both thought he and his bass player (guy) had a very tight rapport, if you get my drift. Was I completely wrong? Chet Chick-Muncher jogged my memory and made me think of Mayer. I know he's got another Blind Vice, but, just thought I would take a stab at it.
    —Erin Kate

    Dear Not Hungry:
    There have been rumors for years about J.May's sexuality—especially after a certain boy blogger said they'd shared a kiss. As for recently, this brooding musician has been sticking to what he loves best—beautiful women.

    Dear Ted:
    I swore I wouldn't pimp out my sweet adopted puppy for gossip, but then I read that there is more to George Clooney's permanent single status than just wanting women to come and go as he pleases. Even though he is like 20 years older than I am, he would still my favorite piece of celebrity eye candy (Ryan Gosling is a very close second). So please gossip guru, a little more info? Love you!
    —K

    Dear Perma-Single:
    The international bachelor can't commit, and likely never will. Guess you still have a chance, no matter your age—George will surely be interested! Especially if you don't mind strange animals and tons of dudes playing ball around the house all the time.

    Dear Ted:
    What has Dommy Do-Rightly been up to lately?
    —Sasha

    Dear Been a While:
    Still partying, still keeping it quasi under the radar with her drug habits. Pretty snore-pie, stuff, really, wish she'd get all debauched again!

    Dear Ted:
    The latest One Tree Hill plot regarding gay leading actors and the difficulties they face if exposed seems to be an interesting storyline given the sexcapades of the OTH cast. Would you say life is imitating art for one of the actors? Perhaps they had some influence on the writers?
    —Chloe

    Dear Art Meets Reality:
    OTH
    has been on the air for so many years it's not surprising the writers would need to look at their cast—or other Hollywood stars—to get some material to write about! But did it actually work?

    Dear Ted:
    My first thought for Chet Chick-Muncher was Mickey Rourke, since he is known for his heavy partying drink/drugs. You said "his ridiculous antics have been going on for decades" which makes me think that some of the more popular guesses RDJ, Colin Farrell are too recent (even though they've been around for a while). Also, because you said "Hence, Chick-Muncher's attempt to fade back into the background. He's actually trying to become less of a public figure these days, professionally speaking, even though it may not look that way at all." Mickey has had more recognition lately since The Wrestler and has had some other movies that are slated to come out too. Am I right? Or even close...Love ya!
    —Jax

    Dear Close:
    Close guess, but Mickey ain't our boy this time. Think much more doable, whether you're gay, straight or bi. Practically anybody wouldn't mind a roll in the potential STD hay with Chet!

    Dear Ted:
    There's a rumor going around that James Franco has been dodging the question of whether he's gay or not during Tribeca festival. These rumors have been going on for ages. I do not expect you to out him if he is, but the female population of the world ought to know, is there any truth in this rumor? What's its origin? Can't take this anymore!
    —Ariel

    Dear Cleared Up:
    James may have dodged questions about his sexuality, but he isn't scared of roles that address gay issues—Milk or Howl, anyone? James was doing a press junket for his movie, not an interview with In Touch—that's why he didn't answer. Doesn't it make you heart him even more?

    Dear Ted:
    I can't stand Skarsworth! Totally think that she is milking this more than he is, especially with a certain celebrity blogger who posts at least once if not twice a day about her usually mentioning Alex! But veryone else seems to think Kate and Alexander won't work out, yet no one says why! What is the why?
    —Weird

    Dear Look Closer:
    Alex and Kate may both be blond and beautiful, but that's about all they have in common. They're missing that spark—maybe they can ask Tom and Katie about it?

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