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Hot Pocket Hijinks Heat Up Seducing Cindy

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As the trials of seducing aging Internet minx Cindy Margolis become ever more intense, the love-hungry gang of men competing for her fake affection are at each other like rabid dogs.

If rabid dogs used scalding Hot Pockets to disable their opponents, that is.

Yes, it's all fun and games until somebody gets an eyeful of sizzling chicken and cheddar with broccoli H.P. remnants fresh from the microwave, something beleagured Cindy worshiper Christopher can attest to after sadistic prankster Chris serves up a painful plate of the delighful snack.

What's next, a blistering dollop of Tostitos Nacho Cheese Dip in his jockstrap?

But then again, Cindy's worth it.

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