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    Bitch-Back! The Future of Jackles

    Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Supernatural Sergei Bachlakov/The CW

    Dear Ted:
    Just wondering what you think will happen to Jackles’ career after Supernatural finishes. Personally, I think Jensen is hugely talented and has a young Paul Newman vibe going for him. Jared Padalecki on the other hand...well, he may be a looker, but his acting leaves a lot to be desired. Thoughts?
    —D

    Dear Career Path:
    There are plenty of casting rumors surrounding the two studs (Conan, Captain America, but I’m sure you already knew that), so I doubt they’ll be hitting the unemployment office when the series wraps—but Paul Newman? I’d expect a lot more superhero flicks than prestigious award fodder, babe. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing; we all need our mouthwatering dudes in tights.

    Dear Ted:
    You've been fairly outspoken in the past regarding the Mormon Church’s stance on homosexuality. Have you read Roseanne's blog where she rips the Mormon Church and Marie Osmond for not supporting gay teens/young adults, specifically Marie's son who recently committed suicide? While I agree with the basis of Roseanne is saying, I don't know that only one week after the poor kid dies is the time to call out the parent. What are your thoughts?
    —Ashley

    Dear Unsure:
    When has Roseanne been anything but uncomfortably frank? Maybe she doesn’t have the best etiquette, but what she’s saying is true and what Marie’s son Michael went through is tragic. I think it’s best to quote Roseanne here: “Hey, I want her and all the gay kids in the world to know that they are just fine being gay and that they deserve love and respect instead of insults and rebuke!”

    Dear Ted:
    Love your latest update on Nevis Divine, but I'm confused. You say Nevis's leading lady is his beard, and then refer to a possible threesome with her and his ex-boyfriend. Does this mean that Nevis's relationship with his "beard" is a real one? Would that really make her a beard? I thought women were referred to as beards when there is a PR agreement between the two, but no real romantic or sexual relationship.
    —Cara

    Dear Hairy Situation:
    Just like the facial ones, human beards come in many different styles—think of the difference between Jon Hamm’s sexy scruff and Brad’s disgusting dud. Many DL stars have their lady around to cover their secret, but others are a little more open to some bearded lovin’—like bisexual Nevis.

    Dear Ted:
    I love your column and how you make a priority of helping our furry friends. My boyfriend adopted two kittens for me for Christmas from a local shelter and I just can't understand how people can go and buy animals from breeders when there are sweet, adorable babies that shelters are practically giving away! Anyway, since we did adopt, I was wondering if you could give me hints on either Sarah Michelle Gellar's or David Boreanaz's B.V. (can you tell I used to be a huge Buffy fan?)
    —Nora

    Dear Buffy BVs:
    Firstly, many of those shelters don’t have “no-kill” policies, and the poor critters aren’t “given away,” they’re put to death. That’s why I make ridiculous statements like I’ll give extra Blind Vice clues to everybody who adopts rescue animals—so, for you, my dear: Sarah’s involves marital accords, and David’s anything but marital accords.

    Dear Ted:
    There are some persistent rumors about some big star's coming out on the cover of the next issue of The Advocate; is it true? If true, is it someone living in an open glass closet already, in an ironclad closet, or in Narnia land? And is it one of your Blind Vice stars? I know curiosity killed the cat, but I'm a dog person anyway, so please answer me.
    —Audrey

    Dear Coming-Out Party:
    If it’s who I suspect, I wouldn’t get too excited just yet. This person has been rumored to come out in one magazine or another for the last five years. Maybe this time the dude will finally actually do it?

    Dear Ted:
    I'm totally in love with Channing Tatum. Any goss on him? Or is he in any of your BVs? Thanks so much!
    —Summer

    Dear Channing Charmed:
    C.T. hasn’t had too much dirt come out since his big stripper reveal, and he’s remained fairly quiet in his newlywed days. What a bore, right? C’mon, Tatum—you used to be a stripper. Give a goss columnist something interesting to work with.

    Dear Ted:
    It’s a long time since you posted your last Robsten exclusive! I yearn for your Exclusive posts! I'm a little bit worried...what's going on? You are our first Robsten source, but you have been so dumb lately. Except for the latest things like BAFTA, The Sun or Remember Me premiere; you made very simple posts, not your usual columns full of information! What happened? Kisses and hugs from Italy.
    —Ilaria
     

    Dear Dummy:
    Are we reading the same column? Because we’ve dished plenty on Robsten (hello, how else would you have found out about their secret Euro antics). Some Robsten fans are never satisfied, huh? 'Tho can’t say we blame you—we always want to know more about my fave duo, too.

    Dear Ted:
    Can we please have an R.Pattz and K.Stew-free day? I dream of one day that isn't filled with the same questions about those two.
    —JG

    Dear Robsten-Free:
    Whoops, too late. Maybe tomorrow?

    Dear Ted:
    I love your column generally but lately there's one thing that's been bothering me a little bit. For all your talk about defending/protecting the rights of women, you really love the words "slut" and "skank", both terms that perpetuate double standards. I understand that you'll probably use the defense of "I give the guys that act skanky a hard time too," but the simple fact of the matter is: You don't. How many times have you defended George Clooney? Personally, I think people should be able to dress and sleep with whomever they want as long as nobody gets hurt. But if you are going to judge people for being promiscuous (which I think is an outdated term, anyway), make sure you're consistent in targeting both genders, not just women.
    —Laura

    Dear Double Standards:
    Please
    , we give dawgs like Gerard Butler, John Mayer, Jon Gosselin and Chris Brown (to name just a few) just as much crap for their skanky ways as we do LiLo. These celebs can definitely sleep with whomever they want (in fact—we encourage it, makes my job a lot more interesting), but we’re going to call them out for it, doesn’t matter if they’re a dude or a chick.

    Dear Ted:
    Why does the media insist on labeling Brad Pitt and George Clooney as BFFs when, by Clooney's own admission, Pitt is just a "showbiz friend." The impression of their friendship as some kind of epic bromance seems to be one of the biggest myths in Hollywood. So tell me, has the media got it all wrong? Or has Clooney played their friendship down for other reasons?
    —Curiousness

    Dear Not So BFF:
    By Hollywood standards, they are BFFs. But we all know how far H’wood is removed from the real world.

    Dear Ted:
    I love you man, I really do. But this whole Charlie Sheen mess is leaving a nasty taste in my mouth. Sure, he needs to go back to rehab, but more importantly, he needs some anger management, before he goes Robert Blake on some poor unsuspecting girl. He's a serial divorcee already; don't you think he needs to put the brakes on any relationship until he gets the help he needs?
    —Sherry

    Dear Sheen Scare:
    Charlie is going to need to work out a lot of his problems before he and Brooke could ever think about having a normal marriage, but it looks like he’s actually working on it this time. Good luck, Sheen.

    Dear Ted:
    Just read on another website Chris Weitz's comment on a "hot, steamy" scene in Eclipse—Jacob and Bella’s sleeping bag scene, ugh! That's not what we want! We've been patiently waiting for hot Bella and Edward action! When will Summit learn? Is Eclipse doomed like New Moon?
    —Caz

    Dear Disappointed:
    I wouldn’t give up on Eclipse just yet. Summit knows exactly what the fans want—and there will be some muy sexy moments for Bella and Edward. Or I’m gonna egg their damn offices.

    Dear Ted:
    Not sure how I feel about you but—I’m trying to think of a way to ask a question without you ignoring it—why has Danneel Harris not sent—or at least we have not seen—the desserts Jensen was supposed to have cooked for her on V.Day. Why has Danneel gone silent, and from all appearances that I can see, she did not attend Jared's and Gen's wedding with Jensen. Is there friction between the girls or friction between the two couples or was she too busy? Lastly, is the real reason you’re being so nice because the wedding you get to attend is at a castle in Scotland?
    —W

    Dear Danneel’s Dirt:
    You hate the girl when she blabs and you hate her when she doesn’t blab. What’s she supposed to do to make you guys happy?

    Dear Ted:
    So with the news that Justin Timberlake is going to be in a movie with his ex Cameron Diaz, how do you think Jessica Biel is handling it? Do you think she freaked out when she heard?
    —Evelyn

    Dear Reunion:
    I’m sure Jessica isn’t overly pleased, but I wouldn’t oppose a J.T. and Cam reunion. They’re quite the hot couple, huh? They almost married, too; makes you wonder what could have been.

    Dear Ted:
    What's with Kellan Lutz? I get the metrosexual thing, but he seems to be pushing it closer to the homo side of things. The boy likes to shop and he carries a bag while AnnaLynne doesn't. Is he hiding something?
    —L

    Dear Lost on Lutz:
    Definitely noticed his recent fashion trends. But I still think he’s hot—even with the purse.

    ________

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