Doth Rozlyn Papa protest too much?
The ousted makeup artist from the current season of The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love continued to insist on the always-uncomfortable Women Tell All special Monday that she did not engage in any hanky-panky with a producer on the show, who has since been fired.
A producer who, mind you, has since brought his father along on a visit to Rozlyn's hometown.
"Any producers and parents swing by your houses since we've been gone?" ringmaster Chris Harrison, stoic yet amused-looking as ever in the face of an attack on his own integrity, asked the single ladies no longer in the running for Jake Pavelka's proposal.
The two-hour special also featured a wee bit of back-and-forth about Jake's rumored fiancee, Vienna Girardi; third runner-up Gia Allemande talking about her almost-happy ending; and the inside story on Ali Fedotowsky's decision to leave. Conclusions: Vienna deserves to find love, Gia is going to be more open with her feelings the next time around, and if Ali could go back and do it all over again, she "probably would."
Of course, what everyone—especially Ella, Jessie and Christina—wanted to cackle about was the "10,000-pound elephant in the room": Rozlyn, who ultimately sweared on her child's life that she wasn't carrying on inappropriately with the producer.
But Jessie swore, kinda more believably, on her dog's life that she came into the house one night and saw Rozlyn making out with the crewmember on the main staircase.
That, combined with Christina's tale of Rozlyn's hand grazing the producer's thigh and Ella's telling of the night Roz stuck her bum in the air and informed the girls that she needed this mystery man to put her to bed.
In case the look of distaste on some of the ladies' faces when Rozlyn was escorted out from backstage didn't say enough, Harrison then sat her down and said, "I want to start out with what is true, in your mind."
Then the tale of she-said, he-said, they-said began, with Harrison promising her he felt no ill will toward her. He also said the producer who was fired was a "dear friend" to many and it was hard to see him go.
Rozlyn chose to fire back with a snide comment about Harrison hitting on her "friend's" wife, a remark that was greeted by "oh no she didn't" gasps from the audience and a steely response from the veteran Bachelor host.
Saying he wouldn't dignify the comment, he then leveled Rozlyn with this:
"I hope truly in my heart that you have learned a life lesson and I hope you will become a better person from this." (Here's a life lesson for ya: Chris Harrison always gets the last word.)
Aside from the unsavory accusations and the brazen denial, here are a few other highlights from tonight's show:
• The interview montage with past contestants in which Bachelorette villain Wes Hayden talked creepily about all the nipples and navels he's seen since being on the show.
• "I don't need a therapist, Elizabeth, I don't. I'm stable, I have a job," insisted Michelle, who during her brief tenure on the show stated, "It will kill me if I don't get Jake." Countered Elizabeth: "Maybe you're a little emotionally unstable?"
• "If I could go back and do it differently, I probably would," a humbled Ali said of her decision to leave the show for fear of losing her job. "I am the biggest advocate of women going after their careers...But on my deathbed, I don't want to look back and say I didn't love enough."
• "We know what we're going to use, you know very well that we don't shoot you 24/7, don't have microphones, there is a lot of downtime," Harrison reminded Rozlyn when she pointedly asked how the cameras could have missed the so-called torid affair she was having. "We're not running a Las Vegas casino, we're not worried about you stealing anything. We're trying to shoot a television show. And the producers know, especially if it's an overnight producer, where the cameras are going to be."
• "Yes, I'm happy," Jake said about his final choice, which we'll learn all about next Monday on the season finale of The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love.
Somehow, Jake and Vienna (or Jake and Tenley) doesn't have quite the same ring to it as Angel and Buffy, Ross and Rachel, Chuck and Blair, or any of the other Top TV Couples you're supposed to be voting on.