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    Caught! Somebody Totally Messes With the Hoff

    David Hasselhoff soap dispenser

    David Hasselhoff and a lady friend, providing the nice people waiting in New York's JFK airport some unintended LOLs. David was checking in first class (thank you, Baywatch reruns) at the Virgin America counter, when the people checking him in totally called him out.

    When the Hoff walked away, some folks at the ticket counter were heard saying (and not exactly in hush-hush tones, either), "Oh my God, did you see his face-lift? Way too tight. And her lips were like Octomoms!" Love it. New reality show, perhaps? Flying Off at the Mouth? 

    Practically flying off the damn dance floor down in Miami was...

    Ricky Martin, crawling out of the has-been gutter to make an appearance at Miami club Mansion the other night. Rick, all chunky-monkey doable, made a low-key entrance through the stage door with an entourage of four close buds.

    Once inside, R.M. did what he used to do a lot more of and proceeded to pelvic-shake the night away, dancing on stage until 3 a.m. in a simple black tee and jeans, which we're told made him look "sexy and scruffy." R.M. and posse would take some breathers every now and then and sip on Moët and Chandon champagne. Classy, R!

    Classy R! All fizz and ferocity at the beach, too, was…

    Ramona from the Real Housewives of New York, hitting the opening of BLT Steak and the Betsy Hotel on Ocean Drive. You know, because she's a "celebrity." The self-proclaimed "sexy mom" has been out and about a lot while her tennis-pro hubby, Mario Singer, been getting down to business. R was overheard joking that she's been overeating the whole trip, munching on the likes of whipped cream and chocolate chip pancakes. Bethany is going to be pissed!

    —Additional reporting by Taryn Ryder and Martin Haro

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