Let's see, how can we convince you to stay out of the Dark? How about Tara Reid "playing" a genius anthropologist? Or Christian Slater in an '80s-era, Heathers-inspired tank top and trench coat playing an Indiana Jones type looking for some wannabe-Alien monsters? Okay, what about Stephen Dorff as the overheated military leader of a secret organization who is also hunting the beasts? Last but not least, how about all of them digging into an ancient civilization's big secret? Had enough yet? This movie, which is based on a videogame, is so poorly built, so horribly acted and so sloppily stitched together that it's not even at the straight-to-DVD level.
You won't be scared one bit, since you'll laughing at it from the get-go. Leave it alone.