Two things Simon Cowell hates: Overuse of the word please and humans dressed as iPods.
Both were pet peeves he encountered as American Idol touched down in San Juan, Puerto Rico, on tonight's episode, which also featured collapsing window screens, a wannabe nudist and the return of season-seven auditioner Alexis Cohen ("Take it, take it, take it!" she screamed into the camera last year, brandishing both middle fingers.)
Well, Cohen still couldn't sing—she was even worse than last year, the judges determined—and, sure enough, out came her twin birds and the potty mouth when Cowell told her to take a hike.
The aspiring nudist, however, Simon rather liked.
Overall, the judges handed out nine tickets to Hollywood in Puerto Rico and a whopping 26 in New York, definitely one of the more diverse talent pools they ran into this season.
Promising sounds emanated from both locales, with us coming away kinda excited about raspy rocker girl Jackie Tohn, who reminded us of but sounds more versatile than Amanda Overmyer; Jorge Nuñez, whom Paula Abdul said had the power of Marc Anthony; and Ashley Hollister, Kenny Hoffpauer and Kendall Beard, none of whom had more than 30 seconds of screen time but who impressed just the same.
So at last, it's on to Hollywood Week, where the going gets tough and the contestants we had the highest hopes for crash and burn when asked to form mini girl and boy groups with their peers.
But then we're also finally introduced to the Jason Castros of the competition, the ones who attracted nary a mention during the first few weeks but who go on to make a lasting impression.
Cue the montage.