Step aside Senator Tim Kaine and Governor Mike Pence—there's another man gunning for your potential new job.
As Jimmy Kimmel discussed Monday night, he's been out on the streets of Los Angeles campaigning to become the next second-in-command.
"As you may know, I'm currently running for vice president of the United States," he told the audience. "I take this seriously. I'm out there every day on the streets, talking to voters and collecting Pokémon—you can do both."
However, on the long lists of things standing in his way to the White House is frenemy Matt Damon. The actor debuted an attack ad against the late-night host, calling him a laundry list of names, including the SAT-friendly insult "duplicitous."
"Can Jimmy Kimmel really be trusted?" the Oscar winner asks in narration. "Time and time again, he has proven to be deceitful, duplicitous...a liar."
If that wasn't enough criticism, he brought up Kimmel's alleged romantic history. "If Jimmy Kimmel f—ked Ben Affleck, who's he gonna f—k next—America?"
Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton had a far more optimistic outlook on Kimmel's campaign. "I want you to know we took you very seriously," she said of her consideration of him while picking a running mate. "You were on the list."
However, it was clear Jimmy took issue with her choice of Kaine. "Were you looking for somebody who looked like he jumped out of the front row of a Jimmy Buffet concert?" he asked. "It's not too late to dump Timmy and get Jimmy."
Hillary noticed it would be easy to switch the two with just the change of a letter, but after weighing a list of pros and cons, she made up her mind. "I'm really, really sorry. We've kind of moved on, but here's what I would like to offer: we could have a vice vice president."
Without hesitation, Kimmel gleefully accepted. "I'm going to be the next vice vice president of the United States, everyone!"