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Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt

Jon Furniss/Getty Images

Dear Ted:
Is it me or does it seem like Brad and Angelina are kinda slackers when it comes to serving as awards show presenters. Big shots like Tom Cruise and Kate Winslet aren't too proud to get up there and hand an award to a peer, so what is up with Brad and Angie? Please don't tell me it's more of that pedestal polishing they have refined to a fine art.
Madame Curious

Dear Get Real:
Look at the fawning those two got on the Globes carpet, Madame Barf. Cruise isn't even in the same realm as Brad anymore. Don't worry, though, he will be again.

Dear Ted:
You're a room-temperature IQ idiot.
Dnordin 

Dear Snooty:
I notice you didn't say where the room was—I'll assume it's in Death Valley.

Dear Ted:
Just a comment...you make me laugh! Especially your take on Jeremy Piven. I needed that. Just found your site about three weeks ago, and I am really liking it. Glad you dare to say what you do...hate to say it, but I think I am the only liberal in Utah. It sucks, you have to be so careful here. Will continue to follow your videos and comments.
Combefarms 

Dear A.T. Virgin:
Hey, I was just there over the holidays visiting some of my hub's family (he's a recovering Mormon). I know what you mean. Some were nice, but some sure as hell weren't.

Dear Ted:
Is it just me or did Angelina look very, very stoned at the G.G.s?
L

Dear Flyin' High:
Something like that.

Dear Ted:
Why did David Duchovny act the way he did at the Globes? Boasting about his family was pathetic. Why wouldn't he just admit his marriage is over and announce he's having a relationship with Gillian?
Anyone

Dear Gillovney:
If D.D. gave it all away and actually fessed up, what following would he have? All of you Gillovney fans have revived his career if you ask me.

Dear Ted:
Where do I begin? I think Brad and Angelina are beginning to lose their appeal, and I have a feeling they were only popular to begin with because of the train-wreck quality of their relationship with Jen Aniston. They both suck at acting. Valkyrie has made more money then Changeling.
Yabberjaw 

Dear Over It:
Let's see, who am I going with at this point, the twosome who utterly eclipsed every other star on the Golden Globes carpet or somebody named "Yabberjaw"?

Dear Ted:
You really have to get over the Biden vacay thing. For one, no one was forced out—the renters could have said no and went about their plans. Now, if they had said no and then Camp Biden had them dragged out into the streets and used their house anyway, that would be news worthy. I am from Delaware and my grandmother is friends with his wife, Jill. They are really nice people, and he has a long, wonderful record of service to this country and my state. Plus, without him, Obama has no experience.
Porcelynnedahl 

Dear Biden 2012:
Not discrediting the man's eligibility, just want to make sure his newfound power doesn't put him on any high horse.

Dear Ted:
I so, so love when a writer openly criticizes celeb publicists and overmanagers. Thank you for hating on those control freaks in your Reese/Carrie blog.
Al 

Dear PR Puss:
At least they acknowledge their only role is to play the bad gal.

Dear Ted:
Crescent Kumquat
's (from One Spoonful of Spice Blind Vice) behavior sounds a lot like the activities you've been reporting on Robert Pattinson, although I'm really hoping it's not. Love to you and your A.T. team!
Lacey

Dear Say It Ain't So:
Fear not, Rob isn't C.K., but right chiseled jaw and freshly shampooed idea.

Dear Ted:
You amaze me. You try your hardest to make the world hate Republicans and vote for the candidate of your choice (Obama/Biden), and now you're going to drag them down and act like you don't support them? How many months ago did I remind you that they are both against gay rights! Don't change your mind now—you've got to deal with the vote you made.
SarahT

Dear Pay Attention:
I told you, I was always a Hillary fan. Just decided Obama was better of choices I was left with.

Dear Ted: 
As you know, a man does not just leave his wife without some kind of support and/or encouragement from the "other woman." From personal experience as well as knowing several "other women," I can tell you they rarely feel remorse, rather they feel justified. When you judge the ex-wife you only serve to reinforce the humiliation. Let it be. Believe her when she says she has moved on and is happy—even if you suspect it's not entirely true.
Just had to say something

Dear Faniston:
I'm guessing you think my New Year's resolution should be to be nicer to Jennifer A.?

Dear Ted: 
RE: Rob So Not Hot. Wow. Ted I'm disappointed in you—you are missing it completely. Rob is adorkable. You were into some debauchery at 22 weren't you? And remember the stamina you had then? It is possible to sow your oats without crashing or wasting away? The fact that he doesn't walk around gloating about it and is a little uncomfortable is endearing. I would think you'd give him props for not being some inside-the-box, manufactured Hollywood cog.
Alison 

Dear Team Edward:
Trust, I adore Rob in all his ways. Just need to keep him in check and make sure we have no future male Lohan.

Dear Ted:
I feel stupid for playing this game, but anyway...Is Baby Tile's mother the same person as Toothy's beard? Love the column!
Jenny

Dear Good One:
I'm not playing "Three Degrees of Toothy Separation," sorry. But love ya back!

Dear Ted:
I've been a fan for years and years, though I've never written in. Love your style—always honest and unique. I do wonder what will happen when Pitt and Jolie split. I completely agree that it's destined to happen soon, but the only thing I wonder about is their kids.
Alicia

Dear Tots for Time:
I don't doubt her love for the kids. In fact, I think that's what's saving her right now.

Dear Ted: 
I'm still entertained by the Toothy saga. I hope if and when he comes out it's for the right reasons, but sometimes it take's a little push. My guess for Toothy is Joseph Gordon-Levitt. He's the right age, born in the right place, has portrayed a gay character in Mysterious Ski, which was in release around the time the Toothy saga began. PS: I love Margo! She's adorable. Give her a treat for me.
Ian

Dear Toothy Original:
Totally woof off, Margo says, sorry (think slicker, more famous).