Leaving your phone unattended is a bad idea, especially when Amy Schumer is around. Katie Couric learned that lesson the hard way, as the 34-year-old writer and star of Universal Pictures' Trainwreck explained on NBC's The Tonight Show Wednesday. "I was at the Glamour Women of the Year Awards and Katie Couric comes up. I love her. And she was like, 'I just love you. I love humor.' Anyone who loves comedy, would you ever be like, 'Humor?' Yeah, no. 'I want Good Humor,' like about ice cream, but that's it. So Katie's like, 'I'm going to sit next to you at dinner.' At dinner it was a good table. It was Colbert—Stephen Colbert—it was Katie and me, and then Mindy Kaling," the stand-up star recalled. "It was a sick table."
"I want to be at that table!" Jimmy Fallon said. Schumer replied, "Everybody wanted to be at that table. I wanted to be at that table, and I was there!"
"Mindy and I were engaged—we never talked about it, but what I'm now thinking of is a bread-off. Like, we were just seeing who could eat more bread, you know? We were just kind of side-eying each other, like, 'I'm comfortable in my skin! I don't care about Hollywood!' I won!" she said. "Anyway, so then Katie is like, 'Oh, my God! My husband is here. He wasn't even invited. This is so embarrassing.' They're newly married, I guess. 'Should I go talk to him?' Like, I don't know, Katie Couric!"
Couric went to find John Molner, and that's when Schumer decided to pull a naughty prank. "She left her phone open to texts from him. Don't worry! I didn't do anything," the Inside Amy Schumer star said. "Except I picked it up, just without even thinking, to text him: 'I wanna have anal tonight.' And I sent it."