Dear Douche Supreme:
Eight what? Inches? I agree!
Just wanted to say how truly sorry I am for Prop 8 passing. I, along with most of Northern California, voted no, but unfortunately there many more closed-minded people in this state than we realized. I hope the Supreme Court will overturn this decision and your husband and you, as well as the many others who want to marry, can live your lives happily ever after as you so deserve.
Dear NorCal No:
Thanks for the support, sweetie. Regardless of the law, this fight is hardly over.
I'm sorry that the voters of our state were too narrow-minded and homophobic to vote down Prop 8. Your ironic comment about animal rights versus the rights of gay people was right on (unfortunately!). Just wanted to lend some moral support your way. Also, loved the Bitch-Back column today with all the barely disguised winks and nods to your faithful readers.
Dear Beastly Barricade:
Had to throw some love your way with the hints. No one else around here seems to be distributing much.
Is Stud Bucket LaBeouf Ben Affleck, and Toothy Tile Aaron Eckhart?
Dear Double Whammy:
Stud is a current superstar. Eckhart is close with T.T., but not the answer.
My love and favorite 'mo, I am hoping you are as pissed as I am about ABC's chickens--t decision to can the Erica/Callie storyline on Grey's Anatomy. Their quote, "Brooke Smith was obviously not fired for playing a lesbian. Clearly it's not an issue, as we have a lesbian character on the show—Calliope Torres." Well, she can't be much of a lesbian without a girlfriend, can she? I've been a fan of the show since the start, but I am giving serious thought to boycotting, and I hope that a lot more others will as well. They fire Isaiah Washington for making a gay slur, and then they're too afraid to go forward with one of the best storylines that I've seen on TV this season?
—Anne D.T., Las Animas, Colo.
Dear Let It Rip:
This is so Isaiah Washington in reverse. Grey's big mistake was firing Washington in the first place. They should have made him stay on and play gay himself. Ratings would have been even more sensational.
Every post about celebrity political opinions seems to cause a wave of reader vitriol about how much they don't care about that info. However, they seem A-OK reading everything else about celebrities—where they ate, what they wore, blah blah. We ask politicians what their favorite TV shows are in an attempt to make them seem more accessible, though it has no bearing on their public service. God forbid we allow an actor to show he or she has more rolling around in her/his brain than just "Aren't I pretty?" Why not ask them their opinions?
—B, San Diego
We often do. After all, Paris Hilton originally declared her desire to be president via this blolumn.
Love the new yellow background You rock! Tell me, is Toothy Tile Mathew Broderick?
—Bored in Canada
Dear Age Inappropriate:
Big e-kiss, doll-face, thanks. And no, M.B. is older and far doughier than our fave closeted star.
Is Shafterella Shoshstein Jennifer Aniston? Love the column!
Dear Spinster Mayer:
Fab guess, but S.S. isn't a current tabloid-filled charity case.
Mrs. LaBeouf sounds like someone spicy like Eva Longoria Parker. Is Stud-Bucket Tony Parker?
Dear Park It Like Parker:
Stud-Bucket isn't a B-ball player. You're guess for Mrs. LaBeouf is closer.
In a sorta defense of Angie, does it really matter what she's doing on the sly, or if she is (or isn't) a saint through and through if what she does in public actually helps refugees and other people in need? I personally don't care where good deeds come from, as long as they are actually good! Or are you telling me that she's dealing drugs to the refugees she's ostensibly helping? Or raping the women? Seriously, what has she done which negates the good things she is trying to accomplish?
Of course I admire the work she does. Just not sure of the intentions behind it, that's all.
Tom Cruise is frequently pictured with daughter Suri...But I seldom see his older son and daughter. Are they passé?
Dear Mission Abort?
Unfortunately new kids are the latest fad here in H'wood.
I have a gripe about Jessica Simpson. I am so sick of her flaunting her relationship with Tony Romo in the press. Did she seriously not learn her lesson last time? Since you're so good at predicting relationship longevity, how long do you give these two? I can't believe any self-respecting man would put up with her shenanigans!
Dear Go Long:
I actually do think they'll last a while. But Romo's bound to get fed up with the Simpson clan soon enough.
I'm embarrassed for your words, "What if I commandeered a proposition saying Mormonism should be outlawed?" Maybe you ought to read the First Amendment: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof."
Dear Think Harder:
Sweetie, it's called an analogy. Besides, Mormonism has reached far beyond the scope of religion when it's financing legislation that takes away the rights of minorities. Wake up.
—Additional Sass by Taryn Ryder