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Khloe Kardashian

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News broke today that Khloe Kardashian has written an advice book, and it's going to be published this fall. Color us shocked, but not shocked. After all, while the art of the written word may not be the first thing we associate with Khlo, she is kind of the perfect person to dole out advice on all kinds of topics—just being the most sane member of her family is an automatic qualification.

According to a press release from her publisher, Regan Arts, the youngest Kardashian sister is going to offer how-to advice on lifestyle tips, with a focus on teaching readers "how to create strength and true beauty in every area of their lives by building a strong body, mind, heart and spirit." Sign. Us. Up.

While Kardashian's book will mostly focus on the power of strength—especially in this world of thin worshipping—we're hoping that her tips will cover, well, every aspect of life. We've been looking for a new guru and we think that Khlo is the perfect candidate. 

As such, we've got more than a few hefty expectations for this book. And we decided to collect all the topics we'd like to see covered so that you all can share in the anticipation.

1. How to do the perfect pigtail braid

2. How to type with Guinness world record-length nails.

3. How to apply a smoky eye and not look like a straight-up raccoon.

4. Styling the Timberland boot: A beginner's guide.

5. The lost art of hoop earrings.

6. Getting everyone in your family to like you the most. (Is it just us or is she clearly the most popular?)

7. How to keep your house looking like no one's ever set foot inside it.

8. How to wear robes as actual clothes

9. Perfecting the gym mirror selfie.

10. A field guide to choosing an Instagram quote. Gurl u r so deep.

11. Building the perfect closet, because this, friends, is a dream.

12. Making your #SquadGoals come true. 

13. An introduction to naming your camel toe.