Tonight we found out what Dancing With the Stars was really made of.
Amid threats, a raging conspiracy theory, a slipped disc, David Hasselhoff singing and ABC's concession that there were some "difficulties" with the voting system, Jennifer Grey, Kyle Massey and Bristol Palin each strutted their stuff two more times in hope of picking up some last-minute points.
Of winning the entire thing, Bristol said, "It would feel like a big middle finger to all the people out there who hate my mom and hate me."
So, did Tuesday's finale make for a resounding comeuppance?
Maybe to anyone who tried to put Baby in a corner!
Jennifer Grey came in as the favorite and left as the winner of the 11th season of Dancing With the Stars, probably breathing a sigh of relief after Bristol placed third (not even second, people!) after a record number of votes were cast.
Derek Hough, a three-time champ, swept her into his arms when they heard their names announced.
"I didn't think I was going to compete tonight—and I'm really glad I did!" the 50-year-old Dirty Dancing icon said, referring to a slipped disc that made things touch-and-go earlier today.
Grey earned a combined 58 on her repeat waltz and a cha-cha—which everyone had to perform, separately, to Pink's "Raise Your Glass," not knowing beforehand what the music would be—to end the season in first place on the scoreboard.
Len actually preferred Bristol's tango to Kyle's, but she placed a solid third, as always, at every other opportunity.
"I have so many good memories from this competition," Bristol said after stepping aside. "It's definitely been such a life-changing experience. I've definitely had the time of my life."
Ironic choice of words, considering who won.
So now that all is said and done, was there a conspiracy theory? Nah. But were there voting issues? You betcha!
ABC confirmed Tuesday, just hours before the finalists took to the floor, that there were some problems with the at-home voting system—though probably not the kind some suspected.
"Due to a record amount of activity, some viewers reported experiencing difficulties registering their votes for the Dancing with the Stars finale, which affected each finalist equally. The issue was promptly addressed and voting lines remained open online until 11:00 a.m. ET on abc.com," a DWTS production rep said in a statement.
All of this season's contestants were in the house for the occasion—The Situation's shirt finally came all the way off—except for Michael Bolton, who understandably didn't take any pains to rush back from the road, and an ailing Audrina Patridge, whose rep told E! News she was at home with a "wicked flu."
"She went to rehearsals on Sunday and was sent home because she wasn't feeling well," the rep said of the former Hills star, who most would agree was eliminated before her time.
A montage of the season's most memorable moments—Bruno vs. Bolton, Carrie Ann vs. Maks, the mysterious booing, Brandy's elimination—also made for some dramatic filler.