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Kim Zolciak, Real Housewives of Atlanta

BRAVO/Virginia Sherwood

You've got to hand it to Real Atlanta Housewife Kim. When it comes to a creative project, the woman is focused. Provided that project is herself.

Here we get a peek into her personal office as she gives her parents (who must be guilty of something in all this) a private tour of her latest interior-decorating work.

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"Some people would find it strange that I decorate my office with pictures of myself, and what I have to say to you is, 'Eat sh-t and die.' "

Gee, Kim, that's an interesting proposition.

After careful consideration, if it comes to remaining alive in a tacky bordello celebrating staggering levels of shallow insecurity and blindingly bad photography, we're ready to chow down.