Dear Redneck Roundup:
What do I always say, H? Where there's not-so-sexy smoke, there's probably some sort of bandana-loving fire. And so weird of you to mention Miss Me-Me, but when she starts up her naughty nympho antics again, I'll Archive her, too.
Was just wondering, does Maribeth Bush have anything, apart from extreme egomania, in common with the divine Tyra Banks? I think there might be a little something they share.
Dear Banking On It:
Yeah, if you mean their favorite thing to talk about is "me, me, me." Well, that and pretty hair. But Ty isn't our Ms. Maribeth, if that's what you're asking.
I apologize for this being the same question everyone asks: But I believe everything you say and tell the public. I check your site every day to check out the new gossip that is posted on your site, but last week I saw a magazine in the shops and it said that Robert Pattinson left Kristen Stewart? Do you know if this is true? And everyone is sending mixed messages about them, is it also true that they got married last year or this year? Because I don't know where to find the truth except here. I'm a huge fan of Robert Pattinson and also Kristen Stewart. Thanks.
Dear Rumor Redux, Part One Million:
Blue (and anyone else asking the same effing Q's): Don't you think that, being a humongo Robsten fan, I would at least comment on any of these tired rumors if they were true? Trust, I would. Until then, just consider them BS per usual.
Is Strawberry Snort 'Em even old enough to buy alcohol?
Dear Coke-a Cola:
Does it even matter in Hollywood? She's famous enough to buy alcohol, that should be your standard.
I just have to ask: Is saying tranny really insulting now to the transexual community or is this just GLAAD being extra sensitive? I never thought it was insulting like the F-word, just a shorter way of saying transexual. Help! I'm trying to keep up with the lingo!
It's really more about useage than meaning, right? If tranny's being used in a derogatory fashion (particularly by somebody outside of the LGBT community), then they should have the fingernails of one of Eddie Murphy's nighttime companions scrape their bottoms somethin' good, don't you think?
Has Justin Bieber even been in a Blind Vice? That kid has got to have some dirt on him by now, considering all the "swagger" he claims he has.
Dear Biebs Blind:
No, J.B. is all tween bark and no bite. His nastiest Vice is his sometimes ‘tude, but he'd sure like you to think it was sexier than that.
I saw more pictures this week of Chelsea Handler out for lunch with 50 Cent. My question is, won't her new friendship with the rapper cause her to lose fans? I had tickets for her stand up show in Toronto this December but I now plan on giving them away. I'm currently writing a research essay on tolerance and maybe I'm just being oversensitive because I'm so caught up in all my research notes, but I just can't stomach the fact that Chelsea Handler is now buddy-buddy with a man who "jokes" about shooting up a gay wedding.
Dear Good Heart:
Do you what you think is right, Em, but all Chelsea cares is that you're writing in about her, mission accomplished.
My sweet, rescue puppy, Blue, would like to know if Chiquita is a crucial character to the show? That is, if she weren't doing a higher up...
Dear Chiquita Bananas:
Duh, she schtupped herself to importance. Well, more importance; she's always been a big part of the show, mind you.
Do any E! coworkers have a Blind Vice? Maybe Ryan Seacrest, Chelsea Handler or one of the Kardashians?
Dear Keep It in the Family:
Yes, but probably not who you think (and not one of the above).
Are they really going to make a movie for the Hunger Games? I am just finishing the last book, and I am sure the cast would have lots of Blind Vice potential! In the meantime, do you have any fun Bay Area gossip for your NorCal fans?
Dear Hungry for Goss:
It's the biggest young adult series following Harry Potter and Twilight, of course studio execs are dying to put it on the big screen and rake in the dough. And since they'll probably cast some of the hottest stars of young Hollywood, I'm definitely waiting for the Vices. No NorCal goss, sorry babe. Congrats on your Vice-free victory in the World Series though.
Since I almost nailed it last time, I wonder if you wouldn't indulge me again in playing guess that B.V. age? In order from oldest to youngest: Seymour Plow-Me-More, Judas Jack-Off, Toothy Tile, Dashed Dingle-Dream, Barrington Bang-Me, Nevis Divine, Twyla Babe-sucker, Terry Tush-Trade. Can I get a "bingo"?
Dear Age Is Just a Number:
Not quite. You're off on a couple.
The next gay Blind Star to come out must be Toothy Tile: not only does almost anyone with internet access and a search engine know who drop-dead-gorgeous Toothy is, but also, even though I felt disappointment upon learning of his identity—not because of heterosexual lies, but being gay would tremendously diminish my chances in getting into his pants one of these days, yeah, I know, an old fart like me can dream—but the most important thing is, whenever I see a preview of his movies, whenever I watch him in interviews, or glimpse a picture of him in a goss mag, my panties still go poof! Proof that gay or straight, hot is hot. Out with it Toothy, all gay men and women should be allowed to live freely, and most importantly, we want to see you hook up with someone super hot and maybe younger: Nevis Divine anyone?
Dear Coming Out Party:
T2, the real Tooth, mind you, not one of the gajillion of guesses, doesn't plan on coming out of the closet like...ever. No matter how many panties he has poofing.